Previously, on Total Divas: Maryse ate meat, so now Miz doesn’t get to. Nattie continued to be the worst, but suddenly realized she liked Lana based on cliff diving. Also, Miz and Maryse might get their own spinoff.
And now, the most ridiculous and sublime moments from season 7, episode 8 of Total Divas, which is part one of a two-part SummerSlam arc.
R-Truth’s Dating Advice Includes The Phrase ‘The Devil Goes To Church’
I have been remiss in addressing R-Truth’s other notable cameo this season, where he taught people how to iron a shirt, but there’s no way I wasn’t going to highlight this week’s cold open, where Truth lays the most solid dating advice in the history of mankind on Charly Caruso and Nia Jax. Wait, did I say “solid?” Because I meant “WTF.”
Please just watch the above video. Maybe just watch it a few times. R-Truth is a goddanged national treasure.
Lana Is F*cking With Carmella’s Livelihood … According To Nattie
Carmella, Lana, Naomi, and Nattie are getting makeupped backstage. Some cryptic comments are made about Carmella being booked on fewer Live Events, and Nattie doesn’t hesitate to say it’s because Lana told Mark Carrano to bump her and give her those spots. Lana is standing right next to Nattie when Nattie offers this, by the way.
Later, when Lana says maybe Nattie shouldn’t have just so freely thrown her under the bus for no reason, Nattie tells Lana to stop interrupting her, then suggests she needs some breast milk and a nap. Lana storms off, because Nattie IS THE DIRT WORST ALL THE TIME, even though they supposedly made up last week.
Later still, Carmella confronts Lana on the street and threatens her about what’ll happen if she f*cks with her paper. I hope this gets resolved next week!