If you’ve been living under a rock and somehow haven’t heard our synth-backed squeals of glee, June 23rd will be the debut of Netflix and the creative team behind Orange is the New Black‘s re-imagining of the GLOW, starring Alison Brie, Marc Meron, Knives Chau from Scott Pilgrim, singer Kate Nash and former WWE star Kharma.
That’s the greatest batch of words and hyperlinks we could imagine. If that’s not enough to sell you, here’s Alison Brie giving you the finger with her tongue.
Aside from some brief teaser clips and vague synopses, we’re still not sure if GLOW will be a total re-imagining of the story behind the original show, or if it’ll work in some of the most memorable and recognizable Gorgeous Ladies. A lot of you may not be familiar with the O.G. GLOW: Gorgeous Ladies of Wrestling — which ran from 1986-1989 — so we’re taking a look back at nine of the characters we hope show up across the ring from pro graps Annie Edison.
If any character from the real show is confirmed, it’s gotta be Mt. Fiji, GLOW‘s answer to the question, “What would it be like if Andre the Giant was a really nice Samoan lady?” Look at that flexed arm in the Netflix teaser. Look at that yellow sleeve! That’s a Mt. Fiji arm.
At 350 pounds, Fiji was the star of the show. She feuded with the only person nearly her size — Matilda the Hun — for seasons one and two, then developed a feud with the still-not-as-big-as-her Big Bad Mama in season three and four. She even had a little sister, “Little Fiji,” who was mostly around to get beaten up. Fiji never lost a match in the history of the promotion, and for some reason had a recurring dream sequence comedy segment where she dressed up like Carmen Miranda and gave lucid advice.
Let’s hope the Netflix series is a gritty, realistic drama about the hardships of literally hurting yourself and the people you love to make it in the entertainment industry, paused every five minutes so the characters can look at the camera and make a bunch of puns.