Previously on the Best and Worst of WWE NXT: The Breakout Tournament continued, Adam Cole got confrontational with an old man at a pizza restaurant, and Io Shirai revealed that she’s a goth loner now and will probably kill us all.
If you missed these episodes, you can watch them here and here.
If you’d like to read previous installments of the Best and Worst of NXT, click right here. Follow With Spandex on Twitter and Facebook. You can also follow me on Twitter, where everything and everyone is terrible.
And now, the Best and Worst of WWE NXT for both July 17 and July 24, 2019.
Best: Ruas, Got You All In Check
“Arturo Ruas” is a renamed and gently repackaged Adrian Jaoude. If you’re wondering how to say “Ruas,” it’s pronounced …
This is another great jobber squash, which NXT’s really been excelling at lately. This one is Ruas vs. Matt Riddle, and it’s done in an MMA/pro wrestling hybrid style that feels a lot like Pro Wrestling Fujiwara Gumi filtered through a WWE lens. To put it another way, it felt like one of those early round Kumite fights from Bloodsport where Frank Dux would fight an indeterminately foreign guy with a sash who does Capoeira and gets his soul knocked out of his body like he got slow-motion spin-kicked in the heart by the Ancient One.
As fun as it is, the match only exists to set up the post-match attack, which is also pretty great.
Best: Flat Riddle
Former Sanity member (who is too dirty looking to join Imperium) Killian Dain has finally left the audio visual room at Full Sail University and is dead-set on putting Matt Riddle in the ground, figuratively and literally, with LEAPING GIRTH.
The attack on Riddle works especially well, I think, because we saw how much of a bad-ass he was with the technical knockout on Ruas, only for it to be immediately flipped on its head. Plus, I don’t think it’s a stretch to say we’ve never seen anywhere CLOSE to what Killian Dain can do in a wrestling ring in WWE or NXT. The only time he’s ever gotten even a sliver of the spotlight was during that amazing North American Championship ladder match at TakeOver New Orleans. I think he’s getting paired with Riddle for a reason, which I’m going to actively pretend is so we can see what it’d look like if The Beast from Beauty and the Beast fought the prince he turns back into at the end.
Best: Mia Yim Street Justice
Mia Yim is “coming to whoop that ass” of Shayna Baszler. To prepare for this, she’s basically following the Lesser Horses around in public and attacking them with VIGILANTE STREET JUSTICE. First she attacks Marina Shafir in the Full Sail parking lot before she can even get out of her car, and then she attacks Jessamyn Duke with multiple locker doors at the Performance Center. If I wasn’t going to give her a Best for doing her homework and eliminating some variables ahead of time already, I’d give her two for quoting Dexter‘s finest moment:
Also hilarious: Stokely Hathaway tag-snitching on her on Twitter to the actual police.
https://twitter.com/StokelyHathaway/status/1154187188873154560
You know that’s how you get lockered in the face, don’t you, Stoke?
Best: Crewsin’ For a Bruisin’
The highlight of the July 14 episode is KUSHIDA vs. the returning Apollo Crews, who appears to be on a brand tour to remind us that he’s good at wrestling. In kayfabe I’m not sure why a guy who can’t reliably defeat Jinder Mahal or whoever on Main Event would show up to Full Sail trying to out-wrestle KUSHIDA, but it is what it is. NXT Full Sail isn’t a completely separate universe, but it comes with its own set of fighter stats. Your OVR in WWE 2K goes up, at least.
Crews loses, because of course he does, but it’s a good and competitive match. KUSHIDA’s skilled at making sure the person he wrestles looks as good as they can, which adds to the idea that he wins matches via wrestling acumen and fighting spirit rather than, say, pre-written declaration of “push.” Even in Japan, KUSHIDA felt like he was getting pushed even when he wasn’t, because he makes a point to make every match he’s in at least feel like a struggle, and at least feel like it “counts.” Everyone struggling to get their wrestling over should get to wrestle a match or two with this guy, even if he’s gonna Sakuraba them to death.
Petition: Since Brock Lesnar is the guy most notable for using that move in WWE, KUSHIDA should start calling it “Brock To The Future.”
Best: Smells Like Twan Spirit
The main event (segment) of the July 14 episode is the follow up to Adam Cole’s Cleveland adventures, wherein he reveals he’s going to defend the NXT Championship against Johnny Gargano’s student, Twan Tucker. Cole overplays his hand, however, assuming he could send the Undisputed Era away and count on Gargano still being too injured/disheartened to show up in Tucker’s defense. Gargano does show up, of course, and uses a Super Mario Bros. invincibility star (I assume) to kick Cole’s ass all around Full Sail.
In the July 24 episode we find out that Gargano’s chosen a street fight stipulation for their rematch at NXT TakeOver Toronto, and all I can hope is that Gargano’s learned from his mistakes and will not let Cole yelling YOUR DAD’S PIZZA PLACE HAS BAD PIZZA send him into an uncontrollable, flailing rage of stupidity.
Worst: Sam Shaw’s New Character, Siri L. Killer
“Killer is RELLIK spelled backwards!” — Mike Tenay
So, the lowest performing Breakout Tournament match in round one is definitely Bronson Reed (the former Jonah Rock) vs. “Dexter Lumis” (the former Sam Shaw). I can’t type “Dexter Lumis” without putting it in quotation marks, because it’s somehow the corniest name any of these guys came up with. ACH’s name is “I like Michael Jordan and I smile a lot so I’m JORDAN SMILES,” and that sounds like Stone Cold Steve Austin compared to “Dexter Lumis.” What, was Zodiac Q. Bundy too on the nose? He’s even got a Stranger Things entrance theme, or, as was pointed out to me on Twitter last week, dude walks out to the Mass Effect character customization music.
It doesn’t help that he peppers his very Impact Wrestling mid-card offense with hokey stuff like this:
Why are you making the framing hands just to look away from them? You are the worst, “Dexter Lumis.”
On a positive note, I could get behind Jonah Rock. Not enough people realize how effective “pulling down the straps” is. It’s right behind Lex Luger’s aggressive wing flapping as the taunt that always gets a big reaction. Plus, a fat man splash from the top rope is always choice. Go ahead and pair him up with Wanderin’ Shane Thorne already so we don’t have to frighten poor Mauro in the booth every week.
Best: I Believe There Are Angels Among Us
The better of the two Breakout Tournament matches was, of course, Jordan Myles vs. Angel Garza. It’s probably the two best guys in the entire tournament, and will be even better once somebody tells ACH to maybe dial it back on the Our Gang-style camera mugging. You smile, man, we get it, it’s cool. Myles has had incredibly emotive and effective facial expressions since he was a Cheeseburger-sized guy on the Texas indies, so I think he’s just thinking too much about the smiling gimmick. Or maybe that was a mandate from some “he LOVES to have FUN” types in upper management. I don’t know, but he’ll be fine. He’s great.
Angel Garza is the star of the tournament, though, and I was kinda sad to see him dip out in the second round. Especially to a deadlift German suplex, which felt more like a transitional move than the finish. Not that it was bad, as unexpected finishes can add a lot of layers to future matches, I just figured it’d take some more to finish him off.
The Breakout Tournament was a really good idea that makes everyone look a little better than they would’ve trying to fit into one chair in the front row at TakeOver Toronto, but I wish they’d put all the guys complaining about the tournament (Keith Lee, Shane Thorne, probably Kassius Ohno) into their own tournament, and then run the winners of each against each other at TakeOver. I will also accept Angel Garza leading a faction of the six guys who don’t make the finals running in and destroying the two who do, if only to bring some symmetry to NXT history.
Best: Dunne With The UK
I’m ten times as hype for Velveteen Dream vs. Pete Dunne (vs. Roderick Strong) at TakeOver as the next guy, but can we take a second to talk about the elephant in the room?
Over on NXT UK, Trent Seven said that Pete had, “other business,” but it turns out that other business was getting his ass straight-up beaten out of the promotion by WALTER. Dude’s supposed to be this fearless, nasty grappler and the second somebody shows up who can kick his ass back, he bails. He left his poor British Strong Style partners over there to go 4-on-2 against Imperium so he could downgrade his competition from ENORMOUS AUSTRIAN MURDER DADDY AND HIS GRAPPLE GESTAPO to the funny Prince guy who does nothing more dangerous than jumping double axe-handles and the fourth best member of Undisputed Era.
You scared, bro?
Best: Bianca Belair Is A Star
There’s been a lot of Sam Roberts-ass discussion on the Internet lately about whether or not Bianca Belair is a future star, and all I can say is, “what,” with a side of, “pretty sure she’s already a star.” It’s hard to tell stories with “unstoppable” powerhouse characters who take losses and have to learn from them over time, but Bianca’s youth combined with her uncanny physical prowess makes it a story worth telling. She’s still at the beginning of all this. It’s not like we’re three years into a depressing Raw run where we have to begrudgingly accept that it’s never getting better.
Also,
I’m just saying.
Best: Oh, Io, Io; I Think I Want To Know Ya
I was really happy to see Kacy Catanzaro head to the ring and climb up the outside of the post for a match, and was then immediately terrified for her when I realized she’d be up against Evil Io Shirai. Shirai’s new entrance, music, look, and demeanor are Hell-sent and I can’t get enough of it. Kacy is very lucky that Candice LeRae was apparently hanging out in the back all taping with a steel chair waiting for Shirai to show up or it might’ve been curtains for her.
I love you, Candice, but you are biting off more than you can chew against Io Shirai. If you two have a match at TakeOver, I hope you’re able to chew at all.
Best: (Jason) Priest-Lee
I love Keith Lee so much. Keith Lee should be the entire point of NXT, if we’re being honest. I have no idea how he’s gotten stuck in the Hideo Itami/Kassius Ohno role. It has to have been bad timing. He came in right after all the big indie names, and right before the mass hiring leading to the Breakout Tournament. Still, he’s got something to offer physically and from a character perspective that nobody else can, and he might finally be the guy to create a true NXT “heavyweight” division. It’s always been Gargano-sized guys with an occasional big man. Keith’s out here getting work out of Dijakovic, Damian Priest, and whoever else.
If you aren’t sold on Keith as a dynamic Superstar, here’s him doing a Low Ki/Amazing Red-style karate fight …
… and then catching a 250-pound man on a flipping dive like he’s a child, in the same match.
When I first read “Damian Priest defeated Keith Lee” I was ready to get real mad about it, but I think the way they did it works. Keith only lost because Priest dragged the referee into the mix, then used him as a distraction to hit a cheap shot. That’s not a definitive loss for Keith, whether I think he should be losing in any way at all ever or not, and sets up something more important for the future. They should just put these two in the ring with a returning Dijak on the TakeOver kickoff hour and let them come up with every bonkers big man triple threat spot they can imagine.
Also, Keith should powerbomb them both at the same time, don’t @ me.
Next Week:
We continue our march toward NXT TakeOver: Chronto with Tyler Breeze taking on … the big biker guy, with the beard, what’s his name? Also, Pete Dunne goes one-on-one with someone a foot shorter and a hundred pounds lighter than WALTER, because reasons! See you then!
