Rusev doesn’t currently have a WrestleMania opponent, and that probably frustrates everyone who loves Rusev Day. Which means that literally everyone is probably frustrated that Rusev doesn’t currently have a WrestleMania opponent. Luckily, Rusev is smart and knows that to get what you want in WWE, all you have to do is call someone out.
I need a celebrity to fight me at #WrestleMania34 ! #RusevDay
— Miro (@ToBeMiro) March 14, 2018
RusevDay Vs Celebrity #RusevDayVsCelebrity
— Miro (@ToBeMiro) March 14, 2018
And we already know at least one celeb who ISN’T stepping up to the plate.
Please stop suggesting me. I am terrified of this person. https://t.co/WlMTZ1lDYn
— Stephen Amell (@StephenAmell) March 14, 2018
Naturally, we want to throw some options towards the Bulgarian Brute. Because we care, and because we really, really want to see Rusev roll into the Superdome on another WrestleMania tank.
Master P
Hey, speaking of tanks, why not throw Rusev in the ring with the most famous tank-riding celebrity in the greater New Orleans area? Bonus points: Master P already has some wrasslin’ experience. Double bonus points: this is the fastest way to get Master P in the celebrity wing of the Hall of Fame, which is what we should all be pulling for if we want WWE to truly embrace all the weirdest stuff WCW did.
Adam Devine
Adam Devine is a comedian (Workaholics was absolutely rife with wrestling references and episodes) who probably loves wrestling, and who starred in Pitch Perfect. Rusev’s wife Lana (CJ Perry) was also in Pitch Perfect. Even though that movie came out in 2012, we can still build some beef around this one.
Maybe an old school “pose-off,” but with jokes. (Rusev most certainly has a future as a stand-up comic if he wants it.) Perhaps a handicap match, the Workaholics vs. the Super Athlete? What about a stipulation where if Rusev defeats Devine, he gets his buddy Aiden English a cameo on Pitch Perfect 3?
Speaking of Pitch Perfect 3, how about a Pitch Perfect Triple Threat match? At least one person is down:
Sign me up! https://t.co/lKSTyGUKcR
— Skylar Astin (@SkylarAstin) March 15, 2018
Carmelo Anthony
These two first crossed paths on this very website after a summer in which NBA star Carmelo Anthony wore a lot of hoodies and scored a lot of points, and then Rusev wore a hoodie, called himself ‘hoodie Rusev,’ and claimed that ‘hoodie Rusev’ never loses.
Forget the fact that Rusev lost later that same night, and focus on how dope a Hoodie On a Pole match would be. It’s not like Carmelo Anthony is in the middle of a playoff push or anything.
Mark Zuckerberg
News circulated a while back that the founder of Facebook is of Bulgarian descent. While this proved to be completely false, it doesn’t keep Mark from this list.
Imagine a Mixed Match Challenge where Facebook users got to select another giant from the tech world to team with Mark! A lumberjack match with Facebook users surrounding the ring!
Okay fine, those ideas are for sure not happening, but we just love Rusev so much we’ll try anything to get him to New Orleans and off the pre-show. And if all else fails, at least one celebrity has a suggestion:
Kevin Hart. He’ll put you over but you gotta kayfabe his STD
— Dwayne Johnson (@TheRock) March 15, 2018
Go ahead and book it now. It’s not going to get better than that.