The Best And Worst Of WWE NXT 12/6/17: Oh No

Previously on the Best and Worst of WWE NXT: We spent two weeks spinning our wheels and traveling back in time. But things should be better now, right? (Right?)

If you missed this episode, you can watch it here. If you’d like to read previous installments of B&W NXT, click right here. Follow With Spandex on Twitter and Facebook. You can also follow me on Twitter, where I primarily tweet about pro wrestling and emo bands, so if you fit into that Venn diagram, welcome aboard.

Click the share buttons and tell people (including @WWENXT) that you dig the column. We can’t keep doing these if you don’t read and recommend them! It helps more than you know, especially for the shows that aren’t Raw and don’t have hundreds of thousands of built-in casual interests.

And now, the Best and Worst of WWE NXT for December 6, 2017. OK? Go!

Worst: No Sign Of Life

Here’s how you know Andrade “Cien” Almas’ promo — his first appearance as NXT Champion — was a dud: WWE barely documented it on social media. No GIFs, no YouTube clips, no nothing. Do you know how bad a promo has to be for WWE to not at least try and monetize it with a YouTube video?

There’s a reason for this, and one that I don’t think most people realized until the second Almas took the mic. My big takeaway from this segment: So that’s why they gave him Zelina Vega. She knows how to cut a passionate, convincing heel promo (and her “respect the man, embrace the legend” line could very easily be a T-shirt someday soon).

Best/Worst: The Writing’s On The Wall

Given that this episode of NXT is the first official episode after TakeOver: WarGames, we got a handful of storyline-related promos scattered throughout to feel like the show is (finally) moving forward. And as with most NXT promo parades, it was a mixed bag, so we’ll start with the Worst first: Ember Moon uttering the line “I accomplished my destiny” sounds like gibberish straight out of a poorly translated Japanese video game. And furthermore, if your destiny is just to be NXT Women’s Champion, then your arc is complete! Your journey is over! Why should I cheer for you anymore?

Luckily, Moon’s promo was saved (as they often are) by the Iconic Duo, who continue to get Bests simply for opening their mouths, this time stealing a poor PA’s microphone to create a new media outlet called The Iconic Times and interview the champ. Absolutely delicious. (And the offscreen, Milhouse-ian “Can I have my mic back?” at the end of the segment was gold.)

Lars Sullivan’s faux-press conference, in which he boldly and loudly declared, “I DON’T HAVE A FAMILY!” also earns a Best for the simple fact that when he turned to walk away, we got the reveal that he was not wearing pants the whole time. Did Randy Orton spend a week at the PC this summer as a guest instructor or something?

The actual Best promo of the night, somewhat surprisingly, came from the Undisputed Era, who clearly and concisely stated that, hey, we’re dickheads, but we’re dickheads who win, and you’re welcome to try and stop us. I’m hype for the Adam Cole/Aleister Black match next week, and for the Kyle O’Reilly and Bobby Fish vs. SAnitY tag title match in two weeks, too, because coming off their WarGames win, you have to figure Ring Of Dishonor is going to actually go on a legitimate winning streak in matches of consequence, meaning stuff might actually start happening in Full Sail again. (Fingers crossed.)

Best: Invincible

Speaking of SAnitY, their heater, Killian Dain, put on a great squash match against a local enhancement talent whose name I didn’t catch.

Moving on.

Dain’s crossbody out of nowhere (apparently now called “The Divide”) is great — dude just throws himself at people with brutal force. I am also all-the-hell-in on giving him the Vader Bomb for his finisher, and for giving him the main-event run Big Van never got thanks to 1996 Shawn Michaels’ assholery. Now Dain is one of four people who will compete in a Fatal Four-Way to decide Almas’ next challenger, and while I don’t expect him to win that match, I sure as sh*t expect him to inflict pain throughout the course of it.

Worst: A Good Idea At The Time

Dud of the evening goes to Ruby Rio(t)t and Sonya Deville, in their no-holds-barred rematch from the TakeOver: WarGames pre-show. Their first encounter was good enough, helped a lot by a hot-as-hell crowd, but this one just fell massively short for me.

It all started when Deville goes for the ankle lock hella early and gets it — and since this is a no-holds-barred match, Ruby can’t use the ropes for an automatic break, so she has to get creative and pull her way up the ropes before throwing Sonya into them to get her to break the hold. It was a neat idea, but Ruby was in that hold for a looooooong time, meaning either her ankle is adamantium, or that Sonya Deville’s ankle lock is completely ineffective. It doesn’t help that, after a minute or so of light limping, Ruby goes right back to using both of her legs as if nothing ever happened. Then there was an offensive move from Riott so weirdly and poorly executed, all Mauro Ranallo could do was call it a “springboard. … face first.” Mamma mia, indeed.

The match ends when Sonya catches Ruby in a triangle as she comes through the ropes, using them as leverage to choke her out, which again, was a nice touch given the no-holds-barred stip — but why are we having the leader of one women’s faction losing to the heater of the other women’s faction? You can argue that the NXT universe is wholly separate from Smackdown and Raw, but when Ruby Riot gets billed as “Ruby Riott” in Full Sail, that just isn’t true anymore. Why should I take the Riott Squad seriously on Tuesday nights if their leader can’t win a match in developmental?

Worst: WTF?

Cool, David Spade is debuting in NXT. Or maybe it’s Gambit from X-Men. (Or, I dunno, Crazzy Steve? Are spades supposed to represent Zs?)

Best: I Won’t Let You Down

First off, pour some out for the homie Velveteen Dream, who was supposed to be in this Fatal Four-Way qualifying match, but apparently sustained an injury at WarGames and is on the shelf for the time being. His was the story I was most looking to seeing move forward after TakeOver, so it’s a legitimate bummer that we won’t see any progress there until at least the next set of tapings, I presume.

Secondly, how much of a dick is William Regal for not telling Kassius Ohno who his actual opponent would be, even though he’s seen talking to him directly before the match? KO’s facial expressions when Johnny Gargano’s music hit were those of complete surprise, meaning the GM of NXT couldn’t even give the dude a five-minute head start in mental preparation. Maybe Regal’s just a Tar Heels fan.

Third: How weird is it that Johnny Gargano wasn’t even included in the original batch of qualifiers for the No. 1 contendership match? I mean, Trent Seven got a shot. Trent Seven. The weird thing is, based on Gargano winning here, I could see him actually taking the whole thing, ending with Gargano/Almas at TakeOver: Philadelphia, which he would lose via Tommaso Ciampa interference. Ciampa should be good to go in-ring by March, so that gives us our long-delayed Mega-Powers Explode match at TakeOver: New Orleans, while Almas drops the belt to someone, anyone.

Oh, right, I kinda got ahead of myself: Let’s talk about the match! A veritable battle of the underpants state, from the waistband (Cleveland) to the weird yellow stain at the bottom (Dayton), Gargano and Ohno put on one hell of a bout. At times, it legitimately felt like Ohno was trying to actually, seriously kill Gargano, from blocking his first slingshot spear and walloping him in retaliation to straight-up punching Gargano in the goddamn face after a series of weak strikes to that one-two combination of Ohno’s big kick into a bludgeoning forearm on the back of Gargano’s head (which 100 percent had me sold as the finish).

These two are no strangers to each other in the ring, and this match worked as well in 2013 on the indies as it does in 2017 in NXT as it will work again on the indies in 2021 or whenever. Just really killer competition from both guys.

So now, half of the No. 1 Contenders Fatal Four-Way is booked: Killian Dain will take on Johnny Gargano, plus two competitors to be determined. We’ll find out one of those spots next week.

Next Week: Aleister Black vs. Adam Cole, Peyton Royce vs. Ember Moon, and my random song title references vs. my readership’s collective apathy at deciphering them. Let it go, this too shall pass. See you in seven days!