If there are two things I care about deeply in this world, they would be (1) Canadian politics and (2) underpants malfunctions, so it is with great pleasure that I bring you this story about Winnipeg House of Commons MP Pat Martin. You see, Martin left his seat earlier today in the House shortly after voting on a procedural motion to adjourn debate. The problem was that by leaving his seat when he did, while the vote was still taking place on the floor, the rules dictate that he should have been forced to forfeit his vote, and a few of his fellow House members started agitating to see if that was going to be the case.
In reply, Martin rose and said this, in public, on the floor of the Canadian House of Commons, during official government business. Via MetroNews:
“I can blame it on a sale that was down at the Hudson’s Bay, they had men’s underwear on for half price. I bought a bunch that was clearly too small for me and I find it difficult to sit for any length of time,” he said while his fellow MPs laughed and cheered loudly. “I apologize if it was necessary for me to leave my seat briefly, but I did not mean to forfeit my right to vote.”
The best part of the story is that, Canada being Canada, the Speaker heard his sad story about discount underwear and agreed to let the vote stand, technicalities be damned.
“I’m trying to not deal with this with the degree of levity that it deserves,” he said to more laughter. “But I think I would have to say at this point since he was both in his seat at the time that the time when motion was read and was in his seat at the time he voted, that I would have to let his vote stand.”
You know what? I lied. The best part of this story is all of it.