New ‘Lick This’ App Claims It Can Teach You How To Pleasure A Woman By Licking Your Phone

Have you ever been confused in the bedroom? Do you think you can’t pleasure your woman because you may not have the skills when it comes to oral sex? Well, good news, because there’s an app for that. Via The Huffington Post:

Lick This, a new App by San Francisco-based team “Club Sexy Time,” promises to let users hone their cunnilingus skills by licking their smartphones, according to Fast Company.

The app requires no download; you just go to lickthisapp.com on your mobile browser and start tonguing away at your phone screen. The site suggests that you “wrap it up” by putting some plastic wrap over the screen.

Of course you have to put plastic over your phone before you lick it. You don’t want to lick something that your hands have been all over, or look like the dumbest human being ever to exist by licking your phone. What features does this app have?

“Up n’ Down,” which challenges users to flick a light switch up and down as quickly as possible.

“Circles,” which has users move the handle of a mechanical pencil sharpener around as quickly as possible.

“Freestyle,” which asks users to use their tongue as an implement to jab at a beach ball bouncing seemingly at random around the screen.

I’m starting to question the extent of Spike Jones’s vision for Her.

Via The Huffington Post