You’d think that if you were purchasing a Mercedes for more than $239,000, you’d be getting a brand new ride complete with one of those fancy stereos that play the compact discs. Instead, a couple in East Grinstead, West Sussex has managed to turn a used, beat-up 2000 Mercedes e320 CDI into the hottest car on eBay at this moment.
With 6 days and 20 hours remaining on their listing, Murdo Guy and Camilla Banks (pictured on the car) are looking at a huge (and unrealistic) payday on their POS, all because they posted one of the more honest descriptions that you’ll ever read.
If you are looking for an immaculate, well maintained example of a Mercedes e320 CDI… you have come to the wrong place.
If however, you are low on self esteem, with a strapped budget, but shooting for the stars, welcome to my auction. May I present to you, one of the finest feats in Germanic engineering politely modelled by my ‘more to love’ missus. As you can see from the photos this car has seen things… things it cannot forget. I have owned this car for 3 years, and up to then it had been lovingly cared for and maintained. Since owning the vehicle, it has been thrashed, raced, rallied, and the interior has been smashed up in a domestic, not to mention the time my wife booted the wing because I suggested she eat a salad or two. ( please refer to photo of foot next to dent for reference) The car was lovingly cleaned in preparation for the 2012 summer olympics, and may be in need of another one now. This car has been a dream, and only broken down twice. But since it has had new brake pads, discs, thermostat, front springs, all the fuel lines replaced, and i even put some water in the squishes. as for the bad bits… there are none… just kidding there are lots. The cd changer in the boot doesn’t work, but the radio does ( we have already preset the channels to suit our clientelle)
The air conditioning isn’t working, but the electric windows do, so bonus. The car smokes when you boot it hard.
I’m sold!
And the poetry doesn’t stop there. The couple also offers up some advice on how to present yourself in public if you become the owner of this fine automobile.
Purchase of this vehicle will result in a severe rise in the number of looks of admiration you get in your local town centre, I would personally recommend wearing a large gold plated chain, a half open shirt, shaving ones head, and wearing 1 bottle of cologne at any given time to truly get desired female attention.
The stereo system is suited to playing Russian Techno, Polish house, Bulgarian dubsteb, Romanian hard house, and turkish trance at full volume, whilst not detracting from the over glamour of the avian fecal mattered roof and rusty panels. Seriously now gentlemen. Ladies flock to this car. I’d like to say that I have customised the horn, but i haven’t. It would be great if someone did.
While there’s plenty of time left on this auction, remember that Guy and Banks expect “serious bidders only”. Because I’m sure that’s what they have right now.