It’s me again with another installment of Vintage Best and Worst. I don’t have much to say besides I hope you’ve been enjoying so far. I’ve been taking all the suggestions into consideration to make this as enjoyable as possible for everyone and I’m still working on bigger and better recaps. Remember, Bray Wyatt was once Husky Harris. So just know you have great things to look forward to for a few months before I ruin it by having a possessed kid write these for me.
Next week, we have three options:
1. I can continue in order with the next WWF PPV – In Your House: International Incident
2. I can go back and do WCW Uncensored 1995 because it sucked so much.
3. I can pick one of your suggestions at random as long as you follow me on Twitter and share this article.
Deal? Deal. *Mega Powers handshake*
Now, on to the Recap!
Fashion Break: Look At Dusty!
The best part of Hog Wild is watching wrestlers in their street clothes. Because you have to understand that most wrestlers look like cot damn fools whenever they’re left to pick their own clothes. However, a combination of them not giving a damn because they spend all their time in their underwear and the fact no one will walk up to Big E and say “nice silk shirt, goober” means they get to wear whatever they want. Add in the fact they’re dressed in super cool macho gear and you get Dusty Rhodes in a f*cking two-color denim short set and cowboy boots. Look at him. Hard times.
Best: Of Course This Is A Best
Yes, yes and yes.
I think this is the match WWE had in mind when they had that crazy boner for a Sin Cara vs. Rey match. This is the match I have in mind when I want to go to a happy place.
Sports (I’m lumping wrestling in here for argument’s sake) has a way of making the past semi-obsolete. Like, I can appreciate Jerry West as a basketball player for his time, but he’s probably think someone invented the Super Soldier Serum if he were on the court with Lebron James. That’s why watching Rey and Dragon here is amazing. These moves hold up damn near 20 years later.
Put this match in 2014 and the crowd still loses its sh*t.
Fashion Break: LOOK AT MEAN GENE, TOO
Ol’ Boner Joke Gene is popping mollies and taking names!
Worst: This Is The Worst Hoss Fight Of All Time
I’m a sucker for hoss fights. If I ever go back to 1994 and do a few recaps, I’ll write a thousand words about how Big Bossman vs. Bam Bam Bigelow was the bee’s kneecaps. So it’s pretty hard to make me hate a big powerhouse fight.
I hate this powerhouse fight.
First of all, Ice Train sounds like a name the writers would give the main suspect on the annual SVU urban episode, but that’s neither here nor there. Second, Scott Norton has one of the worst WCW Revenge-to-real-life-skill ratios of all time. Thirdliest, they’re working an injury angle. Hoss fights don’t need injury angles. They don’t need psychology. They need tilt-a-whirls and back breakers until someone’s spine falls out of his ears. Also, I don’t understand how Scott Norton is built. He’s built like Ed McGuinness draws fat people.
Best: Backstage Beat Down And Flair’s Revenge
The NWO angle was a lot of really crappy moments that don’t seem as crappy because we remember all the really awesome moments in between. One of those great moments was the parking lot incident where the NWO beat up a bunch of guys with baseball bats, then murder launched Rey Misterio into a production truck.
The best part about that angle at the time was the fact it organically worked Flair into the conflict and made me say:
The NWO could have feuded with the Four Horsemen for a solid year and it could have been great. But the “Flair must suck at all times” rule is omnipresent and I know what happens next. Still, it’s cool to live in this moment where I can imagine that Flair is going to go all Oldboy and revenge murder everyone in the name of Arn Anderson. Let’s all live in this moment together.
Also, Flair talking about Arn never stops warming my heart.