I've heard from a few different people who've seen early cuts of Pirates 4, and they've all said it's bad -- like insultingly bad, even compared to the last few -- and I have no reason to doubt them based on <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2011/05/first-clip-from-pirates-4-is-a-real-swashsuckler" target="_blank">the last clip</a> we saw, which had all the fight choreography of a Nickelodeon sitcom about a talking horse.

Thanks to <a href="http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1809791042/video/25099779" target="_blank">YahooMovies</a>, we have the first clip from Pirates of the Caribbean 4, aka Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides, aka Oh God This is Never Going to End is it, from new director Rob Marshall (of Chicago/Nine fame).

being cut to occasionally to tell a joke and make the same face.

Not content to turn pirates of the Caribbean into ghost chasers, Abraham Lincoln <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/10/fox-wins-bidding-war-for-abraham-lincoln-vampire-hunter" target="_blank">into a vampire hunter</a>, Edgar Allan Poe <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/11/john-cusack-as-edgar-allen-poe" target="_blank">into a rape detective</a>, Little Red Riding Hood <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/11/trailer-twilight-directors-gothic-horror-take-on-red-riding-hood" target="_blank">into a werewolf humper</a>, Peter Pan into <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2011/03/channing-tatums-peter-pan-origin-story-pitch-was-worth-1-million" target="_blank">a 30-year-old wigger</a>, etc.

In case you were worried we wouldn't get a fifth Pirates of the Caribbean film after the fourth one hits theaters in May, fret not, this bland, sh-tty franchise will be the last thing left on Earth along with cockroaches and Taco Bell taco meat.

Deliciously feisty firecrotch Isla Fischer is set to star in Desperados, a film the LA Times is calling 'a female Hangover.

Until today, I had no knowledge of the 1980s childrens program "Zoobilee Zoo" that lived on in syndication throughout the '90s.

Look, don't start adding stupid stuff to the comments section on this one, like "OH MY GOD, what's next, an adaptation of (some equally ridiculous thing).

See what I did with that headline there.

Jonah Hill is in negotiations to make his directing debut, and don't get me wrong: I like Jonah Hill.

This shark is pretty super, too.

After the jump, you'll find the brand new trailer for Little Fockers.

I was sitting here feeling bad that I'd covered barely any movie news this afternoon, so then I start going through the trade news, and what's the first story I see.

"Thinking of seeing <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/06/its-all-fun-games-until-robert-deniro-gets-stabbed-in-the-dck" target="_blank">Little Fockers</a>.

It goes without saying that all of the Kardashian sisters are devoid of any moral worth or intellect, but two of the three are very nice to look at, while the third is a warning to scientists who might be tempted to splice rhinoceros DNA with human genes.

With "Bleep My Dad Says," CBS took a hilarious and profane <a href="http://twitter.com/#!/shitmydadsays" target="_blank">Twitter feed</a>, scrubbed it clean, and turned it into a formulaic, watered-down sitcom with a miscast William Shatner.

Great news everyone.

GammaSquad Exclusive deleted scene.

Here's the new international trailer for Buried, a pointless, terrible piece of sh*t starring Ryan Reynolds.

<a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/08/hahahahaha-focker-get-it#more-32747"> Hold your sides and hide your funny bones, folks, there's <a href="http://filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2010/08/hahahahaha-focker-get-it#more-32747">a new trailer</a> for Little Fockers on the loose.