What's On Tonight: A Hair-Raising 'Justified'

Justified (FX) – I could not possibly be more excited about the prospect of a Dickie Bennett/Boyd Crowder collaboration. I hope they talk about their respective hairstyles for a solid 15 minutes of screen time. (NOTE: Tomorrow we have VJ Boyd AND Jon Worley swinging by the discussion thread.)

New Girl (FOX) – “30 Rock’s” Katrina Bowden guest stars as one of the two women Nick is juggling. Related: I hate Nick.

Dancing with the Stars (ABC) – Results show. Josh’s post from this morning about Jaleel White snapping at his partner, talking about portaying Stefan Urquelle, and crying after dancing to Babyface is everything I dreamed of when it was announced he would be on the show. (Although “Cougar Town” getting yanked off the air tonight in favor of a “DWTS Encore” is somewhat less exciting.)

The Biggest Loser/The Voice/Fashion Star (NBC) – NBC should put Cee-Lo on all three of these shows.

Tabitha Takes Over (Bravo) – I don’t know who Tabitha is or what she is taking over, but I am just going to assume that this is a reality show about former MTV News reporter Tabitha Soren and her new career as a cutthroat corporate raider who takes control of struggling businesses, lays off thousands of people, then sells off the new leaner company for a tidy profit.

Deadliest Catch (Discovery) – Two hours of highlights from season 7. The ocean is not to be trusted, people.

Chopped (Food Network) – Viewers choose the ingredients the contestants must use in tonight’s episode. How about things that actually go together for once? I’m voting for steak, whiskey, and Die Hard on Blu-Ray.

LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Edie Falco and Amy Schumer on Kimmel; Ted Danson on Ferguson; Maya Rudolph and Jason Biggs on Leno; Regis Philbin and Rachel Dratch on Fallon; and Mike Tyson and Chris Elliot on Conan

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