The Dugout: Crooked Neck Club

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Now, about that stupid thing on Coco Crisp’s neck …

The Dugout

SoggyInMilk: nah, it’s called a surface piercing. Look /  
 

 
SoggyInMilk: so yeah, I did it on purpose  
ATimeToCahill: oh wow ok i thought you got into a bb gun fight on a team with your dad but then he shot you in the neck and revealed it was every man for himself  
SoggyInMilk: for the last f**king time that is not what happened  
ATimeToCahill: yeah but see what I thought was-  
OnlyThePenningtonManShallPass: now that we know it’s not a horrid growth, I guess my only question is "why is this a thing you did in real life"  
SoggyInMilk: well because it’s b.a. first of all  
SoggyInMilk: second of all, I wanted something metal in my neck, and it was either this or swallowing a fork  
SoggyInMilk: I thought to myself "everybody else has earrings, nose rings, eyebrow rings, tongue rings, belly button rings, cock rings corset piercings cranial drillings septum bones and jax arms, what else can I do?"  
SoggyInMilk: so I stuck in a needle in a part of me that would cause me to die and jammed a Hungry Hungry Hippo food in there  
ATimeToCahill: is it forever  
SoggyInMilk: the tattoo part is, yeah  
SoggyInMilk: the piercing will eventually be pushed out as the body rejects a foreign object, leaving me with a neck blemish surrounded by crosshairs  
ATimeToCahill: cool  
OnlyThePenningtonManShallPass: yeah then maybe you can be a spokesman for ProActiv  
SoggyInMilk: I tried piercing my hair but it kept falling out  
SoggyInMilk: shut up  
DontMatterToDeJesus: one time I got a splinter in my hand and it hurt, but girls started noticing me, trying to help me, so I kept it in and drew a bunch of tribal around it  
JemileJemazel: i thank it look good  
SoggyInMilk: thanks, man  
JemileJemazel: also thank my hands is rocketships  
ATimeToCahill: so your body rejects it because its not spost to be there, and pushes it out in time  
SoggyInMilk: right, exactly  
ATimeToCahill: so it’s like doodoo  

SoggyInMilk: argh, no, not like doodoo

think of it like Terrell Owens

 
OnlyThePenningtonManShallPass: so exactly like doodoo?  

DontMatterToDeJesus: stop saying doodoo

we are adults, just say sh**

 

DontMatterToDeJesus: wait, why is that weird

sh**

sh**

sh**sh**

shirt

sh-it

sh**

sh**sh**sh**

 
DontMatterToDeJesus: what’s going on, how long has this been like this?  
SoggyInMilk: if we wanna keep getting paid, we gotta say "doodoo"  
ATimeToCahill: we get paid?  
OnlyThePenningtonManShallPass: so what’s next for Coco Crisp? Gonna get that batting average up over .270?  
SoggyInMilk: nah I was probably gonna think of a funny way to wear my pants  
SoggyInMilk: you think if I put my left leg in the right leg hole and let the left pant flap in the breeze they’d give me a blurb on Yahoo Sports  

ATimeToCahill: def, that doodoo would be hilare

 
OnlyThePenningtonManShallPass: what if we buckled down and played hard though August, and got back into second place?  
SoggyInMilk: why would anybody write about that  

DontMatterToDeJesus: sh**

 
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