HOLY. SH*T. YOU GUYS. Last week, a link from a website that I’ve never heard of had my inbox blowing up, as friends and readers couldn’t wait to tell me all about this news that a sequel to the 1986 cult classic Big Trouble in Little China is finally happening. I couldn’t cough, “BULLSH*T” fast enough, though, because this was the only site “reporting” this news, and there wasn’t a decent source to be found. Well, The Wrap is a pretty decent source, and it just dropped a megaton news nuke all over our six demon bags.
Big Trouble in Little China is being remade by Fox, and Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is the top choice to play the character made famous by Kurt Russell. What the f*ck is even going on right now?
Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson is in negotiations to star in a remake of John Carpenter‘s cult classic “Big Trouble in Little China” that will be written by “X-Men: First Class” scribes Ashley Miller and Zack Stentz, multiple individuals familiar with the project have told TheWrap.
A representative for 20th Century Fox did not immediately respond to a request for comment.
Johnson is making a deal play Jack Burton, an All-American trucker who gets dragged into a centuries-old mystical battle in San Francisco’s Chinatown. (Via The Wrap)
I don’t know how to feel about this. On one hand, Big Trouble in Little China is my all-time favorite movie and I don’t want its legacy to be ruined by a potentially bad remake. On the other hand, The Rock is “franchise Viagra” and this remake could earn hundreds of millions at the box office and make up for the fact that the original was considered a bomb (despite being such a wonderful story and film). It’s a really tough thing to think about as a fan, because I never thought this day would come.
But on a third, hairy hand, attached to a long arm on a beast hanging from the back of the Pork Chop Express, the recent BTILC comic book series has me aching for the new adventures of Jack Burton, so yes, let’s do this. It’s The Rock, though, so everything about this has to be bigger, better, and more ridiculous than ever.
F*ckin’ right I am.
