Comments of the Week, T-Shirts now for sale edition – UPDATE

Senior Editor
05.30.10 78 Comments

UPDATE: There are plenty left. I accidentally entered the quantity wrong when I first submitted it. It should be correct now.

Greetings again, FilmDrunkards. For just the second time in recorded history, the comments of the week winner will receive a FilmDrunk t-shirt (beautifully designed by Marc over at Encompus).  In related news, you can now purchase said t-shirts.  You’ll have to do it through eBay until I figure out a better way to do it than that, but it’s a small price to pay to be the coolest guy on your cell block!  You can even customize the sleeves to show off your tats!  If someone promises you a better deal than this, kill them!  I don’t need the competition!

And now for the winner. From Sex and the City 2 in 60 Seconds:

jonson says: True story: In the first season of the Golden Girls, the actress who played the most sexually active one (Rue Mclanahan) was 49 years old. In Sex & the City 2, the actress who plays the most sexually active one (Kim Catrall) is 54.
The GOLDEN GIRLS.

While there were funnier comments than this one (AND he got his facts wrong), this one was thought-provoking enough that I ended up dedicating a whole post to it.  I figure that’s worth a free t-shirt.  So Jonson, whoever you are, send me your address and shirt size to collect your prize.  If I don’t hear from you by the end of the day Tuesday, I’ll have to give your prize to…

Mark it Zero.  His comment from Drunk Orson Welles is the King of Awesome Drunks made me laugh.  A lot.

Mark It Zero: ugrghrrhhhh sa frnchk an dare champgnkkkkk…. F*CK MALTESE FALCON. I SH*T ON IT. FALCONS ARE FOR CAKE EATERS LIKE BOGART. BOGART NAILED ROCK HUDSON ON HIS DEATHBED. ROSEBUD! ROSEBUD, BITCHES! MORE WINE?

*Head slams on table*

The rest of these are on the cusp.  From Gropey Captain America Arrested with Burriton Down His Pants:

Pauly Dangerously: “Pork? No, it’s a bean burrito. I meant do you want to pork?”

Chareth Cutestory: Poor guy was just trying to get Chipotlaid.

Donkey Hodey says: You could tell it was a breakfast burrito because it came with two huevos.

Donkey Hodey says: A million monkeys on a million typewriters were collectively quoted as saying “f*ck it, we give up.”

From Sex and the City 2 in 60 Seconds:

Fake Pete Hammond says: Dubai a ticket to what is quite possibly the funniest film of the year! [A+ for shtick. -Ed.]

Påüłÿ Ðąηgęrσűşľγ says:
 They shouldn’t have a problem with osteoporosis being that they get boned all the time.

From Hasbro Planning Night at the Museum Clone, ‘Hasbro Factory.

Påüłÿ Ðąηgęrσűşľγ says: “Has your childhood been raped?”

“It Hasbro.”

From One of These Tools is Spider-Man:

Relapser says: 
Although queer Spiderman is an enemy of Hobgoblin, he’s a big fan of knob gobblin’. [Obvious, but well-rhymed. -Ed.]

From Rachel McAdams’ Butt to Have Turgid Discussion About Categorical Imperatives:

Erswi says: Her butt and my turgid imperative need to have a categorical . . .

To hell with it, I want to f*ck her. In the ass. [I respect your sincerity. -Ed]

From Drunk Orson Welles:

Påüłÿ Ðąηgęrσűşľγ says: He’s not slurring. He’s speaking in cursive. [I plan on stealing this. -Ed.]

From Michael Bay to Sexuall Harass Ninja Turtles:

Donkey Hodey says: Emo Raphael’s primary weapons are sighs. [Took me a second to remember that Raphael is the one that fights with sai.  And then I was like, ‘Oh, that’s clever.’  -Ed.]

From Lindsay Lohan is in a Movie Poster:

Patty Boots says: This movie is like my ex-boyfriend. It’s all, “I’m going to accomplish something! It’s going to be great!” But two years from now, it’ll still be nothing but talk and wasted potential.

On the bright side, it won’t be sitting on my couch and eating all my potato chips.

Well done, all.  You keep bringin me that good stuff, and I’ll keep… uh… sending you t-shirts.

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