Mario has held many jobs over the years: hostage negotiator, race car driver, tennis pro, unlicensed doctor single-handedly creating new superbugs by dispensing antibiotics all willy-nilly. But the job he’s most known for is as a plumber, making him especially suited for exploring all those green pipes of the Mushroom Kingdom in his quest to save Princess Peach once he’s done stuffing his pockets with gold coins and brutalizing tortoises.
But Mario is a plumber no more, according to his updated bio on Nintendo’s Japanese-language website:
Kotaku offers a translation:
All around sporty, whether it’s tennis or baseball, soccer or car racing, [Mario] does everything cool. As a matter of fact, he also seems to have worked as a plumber a long time ago…
Gasp. Though, to be fair, Mario started as “basically a carpenter” in Donkey Kong, then was changed to a plumber to fit the setting of Mario Bros. As Nintendo’s Shigeru Miyamoto has explained, “The scenario dictates his role.”
Nonetheless, just as we saw when Nintendo released the first trailer for Super Mario Odyssey, people on Twitter had strong feelings about this new information. Some reacted with confusion:
https://twitter.com/kumailn/status/904903042230661120
https://twitter.com/DeMarko/status/904828764139520000
Others experienced sadness and anger:
Us: Good morning! It's a beautiful day!
Nintendo: Mario is no longer a plumber.
Us: pic.twitter.com/CA4iNgOFbV
— Mom Hat Studios (@momhatstudios) September 4, 2017
mario lost his job on labor day are you fucking kidding me https://t.co/WRqd1b8V5M
— alex (@shitshowdotinfo) September 5, 2017
Some delved a little too deep into the philosophical implications:
https://twitter.com/immolations/status/904805814447333380
But some of those philosophical observations were intriguing:
https://twitter.com/evansacksner/status/904761260226605056
Mario's job title is officially "Full Time Princess Rescuer". Bowser must be kidnapping her more than we thought.
— Katie McAteer (@PikaHikariKT) September 5, 2017
Which spurred some to make shocking realizations:
When you find out that Mario is no longer a plumber. I guess he's a full time doctor now. pic.twitter.com/tTzMbR2Qyu
— Steven Mojica (@SteveMojica) September 5, 2017
dr mario is not a real doctor, do not let him touch your genitals
— Smorl Girl Axe (@FuzzyMarth) September 5, 2017
Some weren’t surprised at all:
Mario's no longer a plumber? What a shock, he can get a month's worth of money just by punching some blocks and killing some turtles.
— Doctor Cheesecake 💀🎺 (@Dr_Cheesecake) September 4, 2017
And one person made the case for why Mario should have never been a plumber in the first place:
https://twitter.com/steamedhamms/status/904804461805268993