Do. Not. Mess. With. Us.
How to best describe the beards and mustaches on display in Leogang, Austria last weekend? Resplendent? Luxurious? Ridiculous? Whichever word you choose, you have to admit that the collection of characters who converged on Leogang for the World Beard and Moustache Championships possessed no small amount of flair.
At first glance, it might seem absolutely insane that this gathering is a real thing with a fair bit of hype around it, but remember that growing a beard shaped like walrus tusks is a diversion — just like playing basketball, or painting sunsets — and all diversions are on equal footing in that their true joys are known only to their practitioners.
Whatever you think of people whose recreation is their facial hair, you will likely agree that it is truly impossible to come up with captions for these photos funny enough to match the inherent humor of the pictures themselves.
Lest you think this was just a show and there was no serious judging…
Also worth noting that the less wax-heavy competitors all looked like disoriented pirates…
Which is a great reminder that pirates were basically the hipsters of their era…
The only question left about the Beard Championships is how in the hell this event is not held in Brooklyn.
These guys demand to know.
Oh, wait. There’s another event coming up on November 7 and indeed is in Brooklyn. Obviously.
