Heroism comes in many forms. Yesterday, heroism came in the form of a drunk woman in a Chinese airport. According to The Nanfang, a Chinese woman known only as “Miss Zhao” was stopped by Beijing International Airport security because the bottle of cognac in her carry-on bag was approximately one bottle of cognac over the 3.4 ounce limit.
Faced with the choice of missing her flight or throwing away a $200 bottle of liquor, Miss Zhao chased immortality by chugging every drop. Security footage is currently unavailable, but a dramatic reenactment is available below:
Like Superman and kryptonite, Achilles and his heel, and Robert Griffin III and reality, Miss Zhao had her own tragic weakness: a liver that was not about to tolerate her sh*t. As a result of alcohol poisoning, Miss Zhao was not allowed to fly for the very technical medical reason of “should-probs-be-dead.” After completing the requisite screaming, passing out, and waking up in a hospital, Miss Zhao “thanked police for taking care of her” and was released to her family.
So, in conclusion: in addition to her extraordinary ability to take zero B.S. from the man, Miss Zhao also possesses superhuman powers of politeness. She’s a hero to travelers and drunks everywhere.
