Today is the day gluttonous late-risers have been looking forward to for weeks, nay, years, nay, their entire life: McDonald’s all-day breakfast menu is here. That’s right, even if you wake up at 3 p.m. after an all-night bender of Big Macs and other salty crap, you can head back to McD’s, and still get a Sausage Biscuit or Hotcakes or Egg McMuffin. Steve Buscemi is thrilled.
We knew that the menu would be trimmed down, like how some franchises will serve either McMuffins or biscuit sandwiches, but not both, which seems a little silly. And that McGriddles won’t be offered anywhere, which is simply ridiculous. That’s like a band going on tour, but not inviting the lead singer.
That’s it, I’m moving to North Carolina.
Here’s the menu, with items varying “by location.”
What is this sorcery? Why is the Hash Brown, one of the few things at McDonald’s you can always rely on, pictured below Fruit and Maple Oatmeal? Well, that’s because, according to Business Insider, “Hash browns will [ONLY] be available at 90 percent of McDonald’s restaurants as part of the all-day breakfast menu.” I am furious, and hungry, and a little gassy, but mostly furious.