43 years ago, when Rowena Fuller was only 17, she was forced to give up her child only 10 days after giving birth. The decision wasn’t hers. Fuller’s parents, worried about what the neighbors would think and how her mother’s reputation at the golf club might be affected, made the choice for her. The baby (named Nicola) was whisked away and Fuller lived her entire life regretting having given her up.
This is Fuller’s desperate plea:
#findnicolabrett I apologise in advance if the following should shock any of my friends, but this is a last ditch attempt.
You were born on 19th December 1973 in Heath Hospital Cardiff. I named you Nicola. Your original birth certificate is in the name of Nicola Brett. For 10 days I learned how to bath you, keep you warm and cuddle you. You were with me for my 17th birthday on the 27th December that year.
On the morning of the 30th December it was snowing. I dressed you in your snow white layette and took the lift down to the car park. A woman was waiting there and I couldn’t let you go. There was an undignified struggle and my mother wrested you from my arms and handed you over. The woman turned and walked away – I felt as if my heart had been ripped from my body.You were adopted through the Church of England Children’s Society. This photo was sent to me by your parents on your 1st birthday. It is the only photo I have and has faded over 43 years.
I have tried to find you but without success so now I am begging all my friends, their friends and their friends’ friends to share this post. I have lived 43 years with a tear in the cloth of my life, notwithstanding a wonderful daughter, a fine son and a whole possee of adopted/kids by marriage – but this pain will always linger with me. I will be sixty this birthday and would love to hear from Nicola (or whatever her name is now) in the hope that together we can darn the hole. I think you were brought up in South Wales, but by now you could be anywhere. Please, please if you read this, give me a chance – I did and do love you. Your half brother and sister, my husband and the majority of my friends know all about you and my attempts to find you – you would be welcomed by all.
The post, according to The Daily Mail has now been shared over half a million times. Fuller, even appeared on This Morning, where she brought her plea to an even bigger audience, mobilizing not just her circle of Facebook friends but the show’s fans to help her find her daughter. While some people have been supportive, others have made it clear that what Fuller is doing is “selfish” and potentially damaging.
According to Fuller, she’d tried to find Nicola many times during her life. Her worries, however — that Nicola had her own life and would reject her or that Fuller’s mother would hurt the child in some way — had always caused her to give up the search. Now, Fuller says, her mother has died and enough time has passed that she hopes that Nicola knows about her adoption. Metro reports that Fuller just wants closure and isn’t trying to become Nicola’s mother or be a burden.
Not everyone has been sympathetic to Fuller’s cause. Some are asking why she’d go public with this when it could be harmful to Nicola; others are demanding to know why the internet is supposed to help when Fuller — who lives in France now — appears to have the means to hire an investigator. Fuller’s also been called “selfish” and says that she’ll be “switching off Facebook” for the foreseeable future. (Here’s hoping she checks her messages, at least.)
Before going dark on social media, Fuller left one more message for her detractors:
I think there is something I would like to make clear. I have no intention of barging into Nicola’s life and threatening her equilibrium — all I want to do is open the door for her to walk through SHOULD SHE WISH TO. Of course I would be over the moon if we could converse and get to know each other, but I respect her and her parents. That said I would also desist if she simply contacted me and said this is not what she wants. Thank you all for your support and understanding, and should I get a happy ending from this, all quarter of a million of you will be the first to know xxx