Relive These ‘Idiocracy’ Lines And Weep For The Future

Idiocracya little-seen cult masterpiece that flew under most people’s radar thanks to its limited theatrical release back in 2006, is also a pretty scathing commentary on the perceived de-evolution of modern American culture. Co-written and directed by Mike Judge (Silicon Valley, Office Space) the film tells the story of the world’s most average man, Joe Bauers (Luke Wilson), who’s put in a cryogenic state by the Army, then is almost immediately forgotten about. After waking up 500 years in the future — thanks to humanity’s severely dwindling intelligence — Joe finds himself the smartest man alive. And as you’ll see from these quotes and clips, it’s by a pretty wide margin despite Joe’s own limited mental means.

“I thought you were on pills or some sh*t!” – Clevon

To illustrate how society was brought to its knees we’re introduced to the tightly-wound, high-IQ couple Trevor and Carol, while learning their unending list of reasons preventing them from reproducing. We alternate between them and the trailer-park-dwelling Clevon, who’s fertility helps plant the seed (pun intended) for the upcoming era of stupidity.

“A pimp’s love is very different from that of a square.” – Collins

When Officer Collins is unable to find a female subject for his cryogenics experiment, he turns to “the private sector,” as he calls it. There he finds Rita, (Maya Rudolph) who is “loaned” to the Army by her pimp, Upgrayedd (the second D is for the double dose of pimp). In the end, Collins winds up a little too taken with the lifestyle.

“You are an unfit mother. Your children will be placed in the custody of Carl’s Jr. Carl’s Jr… ‘F*ck You, I’m Eating.'” – Carl’s Jr. Machine

In one of Joe’s first experiences witnessing what the everyday world has become, he watches as a woman orders food from the one available option, Carl’s Jr. (think of this as an alternate universe to Demolition Man). She argues with the food-dispensing ATM over her order’s lack of french fries, which then leads to her arrest, but not before it utters their signature tagline, which is consistent with what advertising has become in the future.

“You mean like in the toilet?” – Various

While in the hospital, Joe is mortified when he sees a dark green liquid coming from the water fountain. After learning that it’s Brawndo, the sports drink of the future (its got electrolytes!), Joe’s simple request is met with the same response every time.