Previously on Ultima Lucha Tres: Marty ‘The Moth’ Martinez got part of his head shaved due in part to the betrayal of his sister, and true love prevailed in the end. Also, Ivelisse beat a ghost in a wrestling match by hitting it in the face with a rock only to have a guy show up and break her leg with a hammer. Lucha libre!
If you need to catch up on the rest of the episodes — if you aren’t caught up, you’re probably out of luck, because come on, dude — you can read about season 1 here, and season 2 here. Season 3 episode recaps can be found here.
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And now, the Over/Under on Lucha Underground season 3, episode 39, Ultima Lucha Tres part three, originally aired on October 11, 2017.
Over: Taya
The first match in the third hour of the four week, five-hour Ultima Lucha Tres — this is starting to sound like that song from the opening credits of Josie and the Pussycats — is a “Last Luchadora Standing” match between Taya (Valkyrie-Mundo) and Sexy Star.
While the AAA belt shenanigans, reprehensible in-ring actions and somehow even worse apologies have made it impossible (through no fault of Lucha Underground’s) to buy into Sexy Star’s story of triumph and positivity, it’s very, very easy to love Taya. That continues here, and even though the match is about Sexy Star, Taya (again) is the one that gets over. And gets an Over.
It’s been easy to love Taya for the past two seasons, from her street fight with Cage that put her on the map to throwing the hardest hands you’ve ever seen with Jeremiah Crane, she’s been an absolute warrior. And when she’s not, she gets to be in segments with the Worldwide Underground. How could you NOT love her? Here, she’s covered in blood, trading blows with Sexy Star and I’ll be damned if there’s a good-hearted person in the world who’d be cheering against her. Sexy has always been a better in-ring performer than an in-ring wrestler, and Taya does EVERYTHING. To put it in clinical terms: Taya rules, Sexy drools.
The finish is Sexy and Taya going off a ledge and through a table at the same time, and Sexy calling upon the power of the Believers or whatever to get to her feet before (or during, I guess) the count of ten. It’s an entertaining match and tells the story Lucha needed to tell, but I’m gonna guess when season 4 rolls around, one of these women will still be featured and one of them won’t.
And to think, we almost got Melina.
Over: Lee Ann WAR-MACK
I’m disappointed that the Trios Championship got kinda forgotten in the second half of season three, and the title defense at Ultima Lucha Tres was thrown together an hour and a half into it with a hodgepodge team of guys who’d already wrestled, but like Sexy/Taya, it’s a fun match to watch.
The story here is that after the absolutely BONKERS match Killshot and Dante Fox had, they’ve kinda-sorta worked out their bloody issues and are once again on the same page. That works out well for The Mack, who finally has Trios partners who seem interested in sticking around and winning matches — shout-out to Big Ryck, wherever his bones attached to Mil Muertes’ throne are — and they manage to top the Reptile Tribe and win the straps.
An important bit here is the weird mix of lucha libre selling and American Television Wrestling selling, which only works if you accept what it is. American TV wrestling is all about selling, where every little injury is supposed to matter and compound. It doesn’t always, and we complain about it a lot, but it’s supposed to. It’s the point of pro wrestling, really. It’s the device you use to tell a story of a physical fight. What happens to you physically, you know? In lucha libre, the vibe is more important than the selling. It’s good vs. evil, or “you were winning, now I’m winning.” It’s less about believably portraying the injuries and more about superhuman men and women surviving violence normal folk would give in to to succeed (or fail) in spectacular fashion. So part of me’s like, “how did Killshot and Dante Fox fall off platforms through panes of glass and lose pieces of their skin and expose their bones like an hour ago and now they’re doing backflips over the top rope,” and the other, more lucha-savvy part of me is like YEAH KICK THEIR NEWT-ASS ASSES GUYS.
I hope the Reps get something better to do in season 4 than “being reptiles” and “making Aerostar sad for an episode.”
Over: Cero Havoc
Like you might expect, a ladder match between the most popular tecnico in the company and the most popular rudo in the company for a championship belt that gives them a championship shot on the last episode before what might be the LAST EPISODE so you know it’s coming back around is really good. Like Last Luchadora Standing and the Trios Championship match, it’s really fun to watch, and probably has its impact lessened by the fact that it’s happening in the middle of what’s basically a five-hour show full of batshit bloody insanity.
That’s a shame, too, because the match features moments like a shooting star press countered into a cutter (Evan Bourne RKO-style), Son of Havoc getting packagely piledriven onto a bed of opened folding chairs, and a finish involving a slam off a ladder through a table. It’s good stuff.
It’s all about getting the Gift of the Gods Championship onto Pentagon Dark, though, and I will be DEEPLY shocked if the final hour or two of Ultima Lucha Tres doesn’t involve a pissed-off ninja skeleton either ridding Johnny Mundo of his Lucha Underground Championship, ending Prince Puma’s career, and/or both.
Why do I think that, you ask?
Because common sense, really, but also because the final segment of this episode is Vampiro telling Prince Puma Dark he’s ready to go out and win or whatever and then bowing to/thanking his dark master. And as we all know, Pentagon Dark is the master now.
I absolutely can’t wait to see how this ends. Bring it on. Kick my ass so hard I don’t NEED a season four.
… uh, and then give me a season four, okay?
