The Flash (CW, 8 p.m.) — SERIES PREMIERE. I am super stoked. Here’s hoping it can be as good as Arrow without diluting Arrow.
Selfie (ABC, 8 p.m.) — We will see if Karen Gillan’s new sitcom can build on where it left off last week, and not where it began, because if Selfie has to reset each week so that Eliza can learn another lesson about vanity and social media, I will puke into her shoes.
Manhattan Love Story (ABC, 8:30 p.m. — Over in Brooklyn, there’s a new hipster couple bonding over ironically watching Manhattan Love Story.
Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (ABC, 9 p.m.) — Mr. Freeze, or the Marvel equivalent, is on tonight’s episode.
New Girl/The Mindy Project (Fox, 9 p.m.) — Here’s all you need to know about tonight’s New Girl: Winston is pulling a prank. Winston’s pranks are the best (because they are the worst).
Sons of Anarchy (FX, 10 p.m.) — “A betrayal leads to violence at the Stockton Ports.” Betrayal? Violence? No way! Not on Sons of Anarchy!
LATE NIGHT LISTINGS: Robert Downey, Jr. is on Dave; Kristen Stewart is on Fallon; Billy Crudup will be on Kimmel; Jeffrey Tambor is on Seth Meyers; and Bill O’Reilly is on The Daily Show.
