Around a year and a half ago, Brock Lesnar ended The Undertaker’s legendary WrestleMania streak and started a new chapter in his own career. Lesnar, the unstoppable mayor of Suplex City was born, and he ran through everybody who dared cross his path. Finally, at the year’s Hell in a Cell PPV, Lesnar scored a last, definitive win over Undertaker, seemingly bringing their blood feud to an end. Aside from an uneventful squashing of the Big Show, Lesnar hasn’t done much since.
With The Undertaker behind him, and 2016 stretching ahead, now would seem to be the time for Lesnar to turn the page yet again. To forge a new path, to reinvent himself anew. Here’s seven compelling new directions Brock Lesnar could go over the coming year…
WrestleMania: The Bork Strikes Back
Imagine, if you will, a Royal Rumble win leading to big Brock Lesnar/Roman Reigns title match at WrestleMania. Okay, so that may seem a bit over-familiar, but this time the roles will be changed. Roman goes into WrestleMania as the babyface champion, while Brock is the unstoppable force coming to reclaim his gold and avenge last year’s loss. Really, it’s a much more compelling setup than this year’s “Prince Roman ascends to the throne” narrative. You get to see how Roman stands up to pressure, how he adapts to being The Man, while also getting to watch Brock run roughshod over WWE from the Royal Rumble to WrestleMania.
It would, of course, also be a prime opportunity for a double-turn. While Lesnar mostly fought a clean fight at WrestleMania 31, Reigns could resort to cheating in increasingly desperate ways to retain his title at WrestleMania 32, culminating in a screwjob finish. The fans, likely already partially with Lesnar, would turn completely to his side, while Roman could dirty up his golden boy image a bit by turning heel. This could then lead to a big final showdown at SummerSlam.
The Brock Lesnar Redemption Tour
It’s probably just a happy accident, because most good things in WWE are, but most of the names Brock Lesnar has been pit against since returning to WWE in 2012 are guys he feuded with during his original 2002 – 2004 run. The Undertaker, Big Show, John Cena; Brock faced them all in the early 2000s as a mere monster, before returning a decade later to destroy them as THE BEAST. So, why not continue that? Reveal that Lesnar’s motivation for returning to WWE has always been to redeem his short-lived, not quite as dominant as it could’ve been, original run with the company.
Have Brock send The Rock back to Hollywood for good this time. Give Brock and Goldberg (who said he’s up for one more match with Lesnar) a chance to make up for their disappointing WrestleMania 20 encounter. Does WWE still have Zach Gowen’s number? Have Brock throw him down two flights of stairs. Finally, climax with one more match against Brock’s old-time arch rival, Kurt freakin’ Angle. I know having Angle on your payroll for any length of time probably isn’t a good idea, but he can probably hold his battered cyborg body together for at least one final match. Have Brock beat Rock at WrestleMania 32, then have him finally hit that shooting star press on Angle to finish his quest at WrestleMania 33. The perfect year-long arc.
Brock Lesnar, A Real American Hero
You can accuse Brock Lesnar a lot of things – he’s a sullen jerkass, a bully, a 300-pound living M.U.S.C.L.E. figure, but he’s also American as sh*t. Dude shoots gophers with machine guns, lives with his beauty queen wife and brood of kids in a secluded compound in the Midwest and literally won’t wear anything unless it’s endorsed by a submarine sandwich chain. Probably more American than a marriage and child-phobic wannabe rapper who likes to pretend he’s a Marine, I’d wager.
So why not just embrace it and make Lesnar a totally unreserved, unvarnished celebration of everything and anything American? Have him come down to the ring in the back of a pickup truck while playing a tin drum, setting off fireworks and firing Jimmy Johns out of a bazooka. Yes, he’d need three arms to do all that, but Brock Lesnar AMERICAN would find a way. Have all his feuds end in Walmart parking lot brawls or spirited bouts of cornhole.
Patriotic Lesnar already has a ready-made team of opponents in The League of Nations. They not only have their own customs and crazy passports, but they’re exactly the kind of legit, bruising dudes Lesnar should be fighting. Lesnar is already burning through them on the house show circuit, but Lesnar vs. The League of Nations on a big stage with all the patriotic underpinnings could be a fun, cathartic thing for people who just want to cheer the big purple-skinned lug.
Team Lesnar
One the inescapable issues with Brock Lesnar is that WWE simply can’t afford to have him around all that often. The result is Brock shows up and is briefly this intense, vital, impactful force, and then he just meanders off for three or four months, often right in the middle of a feud. So, how do you continue to have Lesnar’s presence be felt in between his very sporadic appearances? You look to his old nemesis Kurt Angle for inspiration.
Much like Kurt had Team Angle back in the day, Brock should have Team Lesnar. Jason Jordan and Chad Gable from NXT would obviously be your new World’s Greatest Tag Team and core of the faction, but you could also include King Constantine (if he ends up being any good) and even bite the bullet and throw some money at some UFC fighters. Bring in Josh Barnett (dude’s already done pro wrestling in Japan) or do something with Seth Petruzelli aside from having him teach your fake fighters how to punch. Whether the rumors were true, bring in original Four Horsewomen member Jessamyn Duke. Hell, if Holly Holm knocks Ronda’s ass out again, have her come in as the co-leader. In between Lesnar appearances his armbaring, amateur wrestling acolytes can reign supreme, softening the roster up for their master’s vengeful return. Lesnar feuds would no longer be start-and-stop things, as his opponents could work through Team Lesnar in between matches with Lesnar himself. Also, it would give Paul Heyman something more substantive to scream about on a week-to-week basis, which is always a good thing.
Mr. Money In The Bank
Brock Lesnar is already WWE’s most unbalanced character, but what the hell, let’s make him even more OP. Have Lesnar suplex seven other guys for 30 minutes, climb the ladder unopposed and become the most unstoppable Money in the Bank holder ever.
Once Brock has the briefcase, there’s a few different directions you can go in. Go the chickensh*t heel route with the champ, and have the guy come down with an army of backup and security guards every time he comes to the ring. Have Lesnar effortlessly destroy this security time-and-time-again, but not cash in the briefcase, as he dangles the Sword of Damocles over the champion’s head. Or have a plucky babyface, a Sami Zayn or Kalisto, win the title and be forced to live under constant threat of destruction. Have them miraculously fend off Lesnar’s eventual cash-in and make an instant top babyface.
Paul Heyman Sells Out To The Authority
One of the most glaring holes in current WWE storytelling (amongst many) is the fact that The Authority and Paul Heyman don’t really get along. The Authority is all about what’s Best For Business and Heyman is the ultimate soulless businessman. They should be best pals. Of course Brock is a weird backwoods libertarian type who wouldn’t fit into The Authority’s buttoned-down world, but what if Heyman made the decision for him?
Brock mostly does whatever Heyman says, so if he told Lesnar they were now directly allied with The Authority, he’d probably just go along. Having Lesnar join The Authority would be worth it just to see him hanging out with Corporate Kane while wearing giant David Byrne suits. Have The Authority tamp down Lesnar’s every destructive urge and maybe even force him to take orders from a returning Seth Rollins (or guy of equivalent dorkiness) until the fans are just screaming for him to lose control. And when he does, make it the rampage to end all rampages. Blood and guts. Fire and brimstone. Little pieces of Triple H and Stephanie spread across the arena. If you want to permanently, definitively turn Lesnar into a good guy, this would be a good way to do it.
The Undertaker Summons A Demon
I made the assumption at the top of this article that The Undertaker and Brock Lesnar are done, but maybe they don’t have to be. Undertaker’s broken body can no longer beat Lesnar, but what if he were to summon a younger, stronger demon? One that also has a really killer entrance?
They could/should go completely over the top with it. Rites, incantations, witches cauldrons and lightning bolts. Have Undertaker sacrifice Kane on a goddamn altar. And from the ashes rises Finn Balor to extract the vengeance The Undertaker can’t. It gets Balor off to an incredible running start on the main roster, and lets WWE extend its biggest money feud without any more plodding Undertaker/Lesnar matches.
So, those are some of my wild-eyed ideas for Brock Lesnar in 2016. What are your thoughts? Who should Lesnar fight? Who should be kept far, far away from? Let’s talk Brock, below.
