Vanessa Bayer On ‘Trainwreck’ And The Weird ‘SNL’ Sketch She Can’t Get On The Show

Vanessa Bayer
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After five seasons on Saturday Night Live, it’s kind of surprising that Trainwreck is Vanessa Bayer’s first role in a studio comedy. Bayer plays Nikki, Amy’s Schumer’s co-worker at a New York City-based magazine, and she manages to steal at least a couple of scenes away from Schumer, which is not an easy task.

When you talk to Bayer, she really does seem happy, which isn’t always an easy emotion to find during a press day for a movie. Actually, it’s pretty difficult to find, which makes Bayer’s personality all the more refreshing. Though, Bayer admits that being happy is kind of her M.O., even winning “Most Optimistic” and “Best Smile” in high school.

Bayer also reveals the SNL sketch that she loves, but could never get on the air. The sketch is about a job interview coach who has a very specific verbal tic, and my biggest regret with this interview is there’s no real way to spell out that sound – that sound! — that Bayer makes when she acts out this sketch.

I wish you were in this movie more. Your role is a little bit like Kristen Wiig in Knocked up.

What a nice comparison.

Since this is a Judd Apatow movie, and he films a lot of stuff, I’m assuming there’s more we didn’t see.

Oh, yeah. There are a couple of scenes, or at least one that I can think of that they’ll put in the DVD extras. I mean, there are so many great people in the movie that, at a certain point, he just had to start cutting. I was really happy that a lot of the scenes that I got to do were in the movie, but of course there are plenty that didn’t make it in, and I hope that some of them make it to the DVD.

What’s an example?

There was one where Amy and I are in a bar, and we’re trying to pick up guys, and I think that I tell these guys that I have two NuvaRings in, or something, “So I could fit both y’all,” and I start using a Southern accent. There’s just a lot of stuff with Amy trying to coach me how to pick up guys and my interpretation being like 100 percent off. But, I was lucky in the sense that pretty much every scene that I got to do was with Amy, so it was really fun.

I wish that scene was still in the movie.

I know!

It’s not too late; the movie isn’t out yet. It can be added back in.

You know what? Can you hold on for a second?

I can.

I’m going to go talk to Judd.

We’re going to make this happen.

Right.

You have a scene where you can’t stop smiling because you’re nervous. Do you really do that?

I think I probably do it. I don’t know that I do it when I’m nervous. I don’t know how much I smile. I will say that I’m happy a lot of the time and that’s why I smile. I think that I smile at other times, too, but I don’t know to that extent. Like, if I smile when I’m nervous? Probably a little bit, but maybe not to that level.

That should be your mantra, “I’m happy a lot of the time.” That’s a great thing.

Oh, thank you. I really am! I got “Most Optimistic” in my high school and I also got “Best Smile.” So, there’s a little braggy moment.

We’re going to get that out there and let the world know.

Please spread it around.

It’s nice to know that you’re not the secretly tortured soul.

I know, definitely not. I am so excited about all the snacks in the hotel room right now. I’m eating a lot of cashews while I’m on the phone with you. Let me know if it gets in the way.

I didn’t even notice, until now.

Oh…

This is your first movie. You’re not used to the plethora of food at these type of events.

Oh, my God, yeah. And, you know, I was feeling very tired this morning because I was doing a lot of them by myself, but then they paired me with Amy for these last few and it was really fun. I think the interviewers did not get a ton of great answers from us, but we had a lot of fun.

Speaking from experience, those are tough to do from my side of things.

[Laughs] I bet! I’m sure.

For instance, right now, you and I are kind of in the same boat in that we are both talking to a stranger. When I have to talk to two strangers at the same time who know each other, it gets more difficult.

Not to plug my web series, but I do this web series with my brother called Sound Advice. And sometimes we will have bands where it’s like that: They’re having a ball, and I’m like, “How am I going to get a word in edgewise?”

So, you’ve gotten a taste of it.

Yes. A hundred percent. I don’t think people were intimidated by us, I think they were just frustrated by us.

What did you do to make people frustrated?

Because we were just giving a lot of joke answers and kind of playing around; I think “confused and frustrated” in a positive way.

One of my favorite SNL sketches of the last couple years was the one where you and Paul Rudd are going through a divorce, but keep dancing to your phone ringtones that play “I Don’t Want to Know” by Fleetwood Mac.

Oh! I love that one so much. Claire Mulaney, who is John Mulaney’s little sister, wrote that scene, and that was so fun.

The problem is because of that song it’s really hard to find on the Internet.

I know. My dad once told me, “Vanessa, you have to stop doing sketches that have songs in them, because none of them will go on the Internet.” And I know, it’s kind of a hard one to find because of that.

I think that one would have been an Internet hit.

When do songs lose their rights?

I think it’s complicated, but something like 80 or 85 years?

Yeah, so in 85 years, we will put it online.

We should start a countdown.

We will all be living on Mars and we will put it online.

On Late Night with Seth Meyers, you participated in Will Forte’s “Last Chance Theater” for SNL sketches that couldn’t get on. Do you have one that you love that you couldn’t get on?

There are a few. There’s one that I really think might have a chance of getting on, so I kind of don’t want to tell you about that one because I want it to be a surprise. Ugh, there have been so many. There was one, when Simon Rich was a writer on the show, he and I wrote this “Update” feature character who coached people, a job interview expert. I would come on and I would talk to Seth, when he was the “Update” anchor, and I would say like, “Seth, here’s are tips for doing a good job interview. You have to dress professionally and do all this stuff.” This will be hard for you to write, but I had this vocal tic where I kept going, “YEH-YEH!” So, I’d be talking and in the middle of my phrase, I’d go, “yeh-YEH-yeh!” And at the end of it, I’d be like, “Seth, you have a lot of vocal tics. You say, ‘um,’ then you say, ‘um,’ then you yeh-YEH-yeh.” Then I’d be like, “You can’t say ‘um’ so much, it’s distracting.” We tried it so many times. And I don’t think it even made it to dress rehearsal. So, I would love to do that on Second Chance Theater.

Just you talking about it, I have no idea why this didn’t make it.

Oh, I know.

I have no idea how to spell that sound you make though.

I think you would do lowercase “y-e-e,” dash uppercase “Y-E-E,” dash lowercase “y-e-h.”

That spelling does not give it the credit it deserves, it reads “yee-yee.”

I think all of them should be “y-e-h,” by the way.

Okay, that’s better. I’m going to print this part, too: You teaching me how to spell it.

[Laughs] Great.

It’s very compelling.

Yeah, right?

But people get to see the real you, being very helpful to a person you don’t know.

Totally.

Mike Ryan has written for The Huffington Post, Wired, Vanity Fair and New York magazine. He is senior entertainment writer at Uproxx. You can contact him directly on Twitter.