By far and away, the two worst celebrity chefs on TV are Guy Fieri and Rachael Ray. Sure, Ina Garten is an annoying cow who sequesters herself in the Hamptons so that she doesn’t have to sully her vision with the sight of commoners, but Fieri and Ray are the worst: the least talented, the most annoying. And today on “Rachael Ray,” they announced that they’ll star in a Food Network show TOGETHER called “Guy vs. Rachael’s Celebrity Smackdown.”
Rachael Ray described the new show as “the cooking equivalent of Dancing with the Stars.” Guy Fieri, who called Ray “my sister from another mister,” elaborated: “We’re gonna get some celebrities who are gonna come on the show, with different levels of culinary technique and who are into cooking. Rachael’s gonna get five, I’m gonna get five, and it’s gonna be battle royale.” [via Eater, which also has video]
FIRE. Get me fire so that I may burn it all: the set, the studio, and most especially the hosts. And when I’m done we shall all rejoice in their immolation and grow stronger and wiser in their absence and feast upon their corpses, which will taste sweeter than anything they ever cooked, forever and ever, amen.
