Stephen Colbert Is (Not) Stunned That Trump Stole $250 Million From His Dipsh*t Supporters For An ‘Election Defense Fund’ That Didn’t Exist

It’s been nearly 17 months since Donald Trump begrudgingly left the White House—albeit without admitting defeat—and yet the former president still has the ability to surprise us with his unconscionable behavior, particularly toward the very people who have moronically believed his lies. This week we learned that Trump fleeced his supporters under the guise of political justice to the tune of $250 million—a “bombshell” that shook Stephen Colbert.

On Tuesday night, the Late Show host was ready to dig into every dirty detail of the nonexistent entity that allowed the former president to line his pockets with the hard-earned money of the individuals who actually trust him. Colbert admitted that he was still “digesting” the revelation that Trump “demanded his followers donate to something called the Official Election Defense Fund, which raised a quarter of a BILLION dollars. And surprise, surprise: the committee discovered the whole thing was a grift.”

The select committee explained that even though the Trump campaign knew their claims of voter fraud were absolute bullshit, they used the momentum they had going to get the MAGAites all worked up over the possibility of the election being “stolen” from The Donald. They sent out countless emails asking their most ardent supporters to give whatever they could spare to the fund, which the committee further discovered did not actually exist—making it painfully clear that Trump may indeed be playing by George Costanza’s rulebook, as Ari Melber suggested earlier this week. (Remember The Human Fund?) An aghast Colbert broke it all down:

So he duped $250 million from his most passionate supporters, then watched as they all go to prison while he sat in Mar-a-Lago double-fisting coconut shrimp…

So, if there was no Election Defense Fund, where did the money go? Well, according to the committee, there was a $1 million donation to the personal foundation of the former president’s chief of staff, Mark Meadows. Yes, the Meadows Foundation is a charity that raises money to fund research into how much money it can raise.

They also skimmed off over $200,000 for the former president’s hotels, and that was just Giuliani’s bar tab.

But it wasn’t just Trump himself who enjoyed the financial windfall. As we learned earlier this week, Donald Jr.’s fiancée Kimberly Guilfoyle (lucky gal!) scored a $60,000 paycheck for introducing her future father-in-law at January 6th’s stop the steal rally—a gig that took her just about two minutes to complete. (Though Colbert contends that, given her past eloquence, she was probably “worth every dime.”)

Kimberly Guilfoyle
CBS

Given all the despicable—and presumably criminal—behavior that the committee has discovered, Colbert knows the big question on everyone’s mind is: Who is going to jail, and how quickly will it take to stick ‘em there? The answer to those queries, unfortunately, is “no one” and “no time soon.” As the Late Show host explained, committee chair and Mississippi congressman Bennie Thompson said that “members of the panel will not make any criminal referral of the former president or anyone else to the Justice Department.” To which Colbert responded: “Counterpoint: Why not?”

You can watch the full clip above, beginning around the 2:55 mark.