Homer Simpson has had a lot of jobs in his life, most of them wildly successful for a week, then never mentioned again. There’s safety inspector, boxer, mascot, astronaut, baby proofer, imitation Krusty, duck driver, hippie, plow driver, food critic, conceptual artist, grease salesman, carny, mayor, grifter, body guard for the mayor, country western manager, garbage commissioner, mountain climber, farmer, inventor, Smithers, Poochie, celebrity assistant, power plant worker, fortune cookie writer, beer baron, Kwik-E-Mart jerk, homophobe, missionary, etc. But there’s one gig he’s extremely gifted at: Denver Broncos owner.
At the end of season eight’s “You Only Move Twice,” which aired in 1996, Hank Scorpio gives Homer the keys to the Broncos (“Broncos don’t have keys”), who then both sucked and blew. Nine years later, though, Homer apparently guided them to the Super Bowl, as seen in season 17’s “Bonfire of the Manatees.” They even won, beating the Seahawks 19-14. Those teams face off again this Sunday, in a game that’s sure to be louder than Al’s jacket. I’m not sure who’s going to win, except for America when this happens to Peyton.
