Kate Upton Wants Smaller Boobs So She Can Go Braless (Yes, This Is News)

If you are a regular reader of With Leather or even mildly aware of Kate Upton’s existence, you’ll respond to that headline in one of two ways:

1. “Oh, that sounds reasonable. Makes sense.” or
2. EVERYONE INTO THE BOMB SHELTER, NOW

But yeah, according to a not-exploitative-at-all interview with Kate in US Magazine that I will not-at-all-exploitatively share with you now, a model known for three consecutive Sports Illustrated swimsuit covers, professionally running in slow motion and finding new ways to work “Kate Upton’s boobs” into things would like to be flat-chested. Adjust your “good for her” and “OH GOD NOs” accordingly.

“Every single day I’m like, ‘Oh man, it would be so much easier,’ especially if people didn’t constantly bring them up,” the Vogue cover girl added. “If I could just take them off like they were clip-ons…”

The two-time consecutive Sports Illustrated Swimsuit cover model continued to express her dismay over her busty body. “I know I say I wish I had smaller boobs,” she shared, “and that’s true because at least twice a day I wish that.

And here’s a part we can all “oh God no” at:

Upton and her coveted curves will star alongside Cameron Diaz and Leslie Mann in the upcoming flick The Other Woman. A movie preview shows Body Book author Diaz and Mann ogling over Upton’s physique, clad in a tiny white bikini. “In my eyes, Cameron Diaz has the perfect figure,” Upton said.

I guess we should start bracing ourselves now for that moment when Kate decides she wants to be taken seriously as an actress and drops everything to look as bland as possible, aka the “Jennifer Connelly,” aka the “Katherine Heigl.” I am okay taking you seriously as the lady in the sexy Easter bunny costume, but I guess I understand.