Welcome to the Crumbl Cookie report! Let’s get straight to the point here: after a few weeks of forgettable cookie releases, this week has a near-perfect roster. And even though we didn’t like every single cookie this week, all eight are at least interesting enough that we think any of them are worth a trip to Crumbl.
But, of course, there is a hierarchy. Some of these cookies must be experienced, we’re going to go ahead and say at least three of them are absolute essentials. For the other five, it’s going to depend on whether you’re into or not into particular ingredients.
Now that Crumbl has shifted to an eight-cookie-a-week roster permanently, we have to wonder — why the hell isn’t there an eight-pack box yet? We have four, six, and 12, but if you want all eight you’re going to have to buy a six-pack box, and then two singles, which is going to run you nearly $40. Our goal is to help ensure that you never spend that much at Crumbl.
So without further ado, here are all eight cookies at Crumbl this week, ranked from least essential to most delicious.
8. Strawberry Pretzel Pie
Thoughts & Tasting Notes:
What exactly is going on here? I mean, look at this thing — I know Crumbl isn’t always consistent in its designs, but this thing looks straight up bad. I don’t normally let the visual of a cookie affect my review of it, but it’s kind of hard when it looks this bad.
Looks aside, I think this cookie is just a mess of clashing flavors that don’t really complement one another. On top of a buttery cookie base sits a layer of whipped cream cheese, a dollop of strawberry jam, and some crumbled pretzels on the top and along the rim.
Texturally, I’ll give it to this cookie, it has a wonderful combination of chewy and crunchy sensations. But the flavor is awful. It’s buttery, sweet, tart, salty, and tangy. A combination of a few of those would work, but all together, it just comes across as a cacophony of clashing sensations.
It’s as if free jazz was a cookie.
The Bottom Line:
Maybe the worst Crumbl cookie I’ve ever had. Ever. It certainly doesn’t help that they clearly botched the construction of mine.
7. Churro Cake
Thoughts & Tasting Notes:
Considering I often rank the Crumbl’s Churro cookie quite high, I had high hopes for this one, but unfortunately, these cinnamon-rich flavors just don’t work as well when in cake form.
The cake features two tiers of white cake infused with cinnamon and sugar, sandwiched together and topped with cinnamon buttercream and a touch of cinnamon streusel.
My main issue here is the cake is so soft and gummy that the texture, coupled with the sweet blend of sugar and cinnamon, comes across as a bit too sweet to be enjoyable. This is the sort of cake you can’t have more than a couple of forkfuls. It lacks the crunchier texture of its cookie counterpart.
The Bottom Line:
Not nearly as good as Crumbl’s Churro Cookie. The Churro Cake is sweet to the point of being overwhelming.
6. Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chip
Thoughts & Tasting Notes:
The Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chip cookie will always be one of my favorite Crumbl recipes, but, as you know, it’s available bi-weekly, so it almost always feels absolutely inessential.
If you’ve never experienced this cookie, here is what to expect: a brown sugar and butter base generously adorned with chunky semi-sweet chocolate ships and just a pinch of salt.
The Bottom Line:
Inessential, but damn delicious.
5. Lemon Blueberry Cheesecake
Thoughts & Tasting Notes:
I’m a bit torn on Crumbl’s Cheesecake offerings. In general, I find them to be a bit lazy and unimaginative. But for every five or so that feel like simple ingredients swaps, there will be one like the Lemon Blueberry Cheesecake. A cake so delicious that it restores my faith in Crumbl.
This lemon cheesecake features swirls of blueberry jam, a dollop of whipped cream, and a lemon slice for a tart bright garnish. All of this is served over a buttery graham cracker crust that tastes so good and adds so much texture that you’ll wish it was at least twice as thick.
The Bottom Line:
One of Crumbl’s very best iterations of the cheesecake.
4. Chocolate Crumb ft. Oreo
Thoughts & Tasting Notes:
If you’re looking at this cookie thinking it looks like a giant Oreo, go ahead and assume it tastes like one too!
It has that dark semi-bitter cocoa flavor typical of Oreos, and it even crumbles like the real thing once you bite into it. It differs in that the vanilla cream cheese frosting tastes more elevated than the cheap soybean oil-based cream in your typical Oreo.
Does this make it superior to an actual Oreo? I’m not entirely sure. I think if I had a specific craving for an Oreo, nothing is going to hit the spot
like the real thing.
The Bottom Line:
A giant, slightly elevated Oreo cookie.
3. Sea Salt Toffee
Thoughts & Tasting Notes:
This cookie might look a little boring, but its packing a whole lot of flavor. The cookie base tastes similar to Crumbl’s chocolate chip cookies, offering a buttery and brown sugar-rich base infused with milk chocolate, and shards of crunchy, rich, caramel-heavy toffee, and a pinch of sea salt.
Although used sparingly, the sea salt does a lot here, complementing the rich, burnt-sugar sweetness of the toffee. This cookie tastes like indulgence at its finest.
The Bottom Line:
Rich and sweet with an addicting toasty caramelized sugar quality.
2. Peanut Butter ft. Snickers
Thoughts & Tasting Notes:
I once gave this cookie the top spot, and while I still think its pretty damn good, I’m going to have to give the crown to another cookie this week. That isn’t to say this isn’t a must-eat cookie though. Definitely pick one of these up if you haven’t had it.
The Peanut Butter ft. Snickers features a nutty peanut butter base topped with toasty caramel buttercream, a milk chocolate drizzle, and pieces of chopped-up Snickers. It’s earthy, toasty, and well-balanced with rich chocolate notes.
The Bottom Line:
Delicious, toasty, nutty and rich.
1. Brownie Batter
Thoughts & Tasting Notes:
I’ve been waiting for this cookie to come back to Crumbl for some time, and now that its back I can’t help but give it the top spot. Of the eight cookies, this is the one that brought me the most joy.
This cookie is essentially a giant brownie in the shape of a cookie. It’s moist, has a decadent chocolate-forward flavor, is very rich, and has a gooey fudge center complemented by semi-sweet chocolate bitterness on the backend.
This cookie is so rich you’re going to need some sort of liquid to help it go down, but it’ll be worth it as your taste buds are flooded with indulgent chocolatey flavor.
The Bottom Line:
It captures everything great about a fresh fudge brownie, with the crumbly texture you expect from a great cookie. It’s a best of both worlds sort of dessert.
Find your nearest Crumbl Cookie here.
