Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure may have been released in early 1989, but the concept for the film came well before that. In 1983, writers Ed Solomon and Chris Matheson formed an improv workshop with a few of their fellow UCLA students. One of the sketches conceived involved three dopey friends who knew nothing about history… talking about history. To think that a few friends goofing off planted the seeds for something that we’re still talking about and referencing is amazing, but then again, isn’t that always the way?
To celebrate our continuing curiosity with Bill and Ted, we thought we’d take a look back at some of the great lines from the original and remind ourselves of why a sequel might not be the worst idea in the world.
Bill and Ted: EXCELLENT! (guitar riff)
The opening scene of Excellent Adventure with Bill and Ted arguing over which element of rock fame they need first — amazing instruments, a music video, the ability to play those instruments, or the presence of Eddie Van Halen — more or less tells us everything we need to know about our main characters. They’re intensely likeable guys with delusions of grandeur who are just smart enough to get themselves into trouble. So, of course, they end up bringing about world peace through rock music.
Mr. Ryan: Who was Joan of Arc?
Ted: Noah’s wife?
When production originally began on the movie, the plan was to have Bill and Ted not only be inept academically, but socially as well. There was actually a scene filmed of the two time-travelling goofballs walking past a group of disdainful popular kids. According to Ed Solomon, however, “once you cast Alex [Winter] and Keanu [Reeves], who look like pretty cool guys, that was hard to believe.” So, the decision was made to have them be cool… and just kinda dumb.
Ted: Excuse me? When did the Mongols rule China?
Woman: I don’t know, I just work here.
For those interested, the Mongol invasion of China, led by Kublai Khan (grandson of Genghis), began in 1279 and continued on until 1368. This was known as the Yuan Dynasty, with “yuan” translated as “origin of the universe.” As far as we know, knowing this information isn’t necessary as part of the employment process at Circle K, but it probably doesn’t hurt. Speaking of Circle K…
Ted: Bill?
Bill: What?
Ted: Strange things are afoot at the Circle K.
Chris Matheson is more than just one of the talented writers behind the film series. He’s also the son of sci-fi giant Richard Matheson, author of I Am Legend. Early on, Bill and Ted was going to be a sketch film — Matheson was intentionally trying to avoid science fiction so as to not be compared to his dad. One of the sketches was based around time travel, however, and when the elder Matheson read it, he suggested that it should be a film on its own.
Ted: Okay, if you guys are really us, what number are we thinking of?
Future Bill and Future Ted: SIXTY-NINE, DUDES!!!
Apparently time-travel doesn’t change a person that much.
Bill: How’s it going, royal ugly dudes? I am the Earl of Preston!
Ted: And I am the Duke of Ted!
Henry VII: Put them in the iron maiden.
Ted: Iron Maiden?
Bill and Ted: Excellent! [air guitar]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rE3bc8rCy6Q
Different Iron Maiden, dudes.
Bill: You killed Ted, you medieval dickweed!
Would Bill have been as upset at the presumed demise of his compatriot if Ted had, instead, been portrayed by, say, Pauly Shore? Probably, since it was in the script and all. However, Shore had, indeed, auditioned for the role of Ted before Keanu Reeves had been cast. You can actually see Shore “confront” Reeves about it during an MTV special for the film’s sequel.
Bill: You ditched Napoleon!?
Ted: Deacon, do you realize you have just stranded one of Europe’s greatest leaders in San Dimas?
Deacon: He was a dick!
You don’t have to be a history major to catch the joke behind Napoleon ending up at a water park called “Waterloo”. One reference that may not be as obvious, however, occurs during Bill and Ted’s presentation at the end of the film. While describing a battle plan to our heroes and their audience, a close look at the map indicated that he’s actually describing what would eventually be his failed invasion of Russia in 1812. If only he had listened to Bill’s advice of “I don’t think it’ll work” when he returned to his own time.
Abraham Lincoln: Fourscore and… (looks at his pocket watch) seven minutes ago… we, your forefathers, were brought forth upon a most excellent adventure conceived by our new friends, Bill… and Ted. These two great gentlemen are dedicated to a proposition which was true in my time, just as it’s true today. Be excellent to each other. And… PARTY ON, DUDES!
Wise words we should all attempt to live by.
Ted: Do you know how to play, Rufus?
Rufus: I play a little.
Clearly, the guys don’t need Van Halen if George Carlin can shred like that.
