If you’ve seen the new Star Wars, then you’ll probably agree that the film’s most tragic story arc involves Han Solo and his kid. To recap, Han Solo and Leia had a son who went to the dark side, and who ditched his given name (Ben) for the more dark side-y Kylo Ren. And this Han Solo Twitter parody account isn’t here to capitalize on the pathos of that relationship, with @dadjokehansolo, in which Han Solo tells–you guessed it–Dad jokes in order to bond, in vain, with his son.
Here are some of his hopelessly dorky and desperate jokes:
Ben asked what my favorite food is
I said Chewbacon!
He said what is Chewie's favorite food then
I said Ham Solo
He almost threw up
— Dad Joke Han Solo (@dadjokehansolo) January 13, 2016
Me: Ben for your birthday I'm giving you Mynocks
Ben: Dad why
Me: I want them to be Yournocks!Ben having a funny father is the real gift
— Dad Joke Han Solo (@dadjokehansolo) January 13, 2016
“Ben having a funny father is the real gift.” :(
He even brings Uncle Luke into it:
I brought Luke a movie to watch after his hand surgery
1st thing he said: What movie did you bring?
1st thing I said: "Cool Hand, Luke!!"
— Dad Joke Han Solo (@dadjokehansolo) January 13, 2016
When Luke lost the fight against Darth Vader on Cloud City I asked if I could "lend a hand"
Luke said ow ow oh god I'm bleeding please help
— Dad Joke Han Solo (@dadjokehansolo) January 13, 2016
It must be tough for your son to turn evil, and to feel responsible for that, but Han, you used to be cool. Trying to get your ungrateful son to like you again by making a bunch of lame jokes on Twitter (“Ben, why aren’t you laughing? This is great stuff!”) is beneath you.
Today @KyloR3n said I should call my ship the "Millennium Failcon"
I told him that's not a very good joke
— Dad Joke Han Solo (@dadjokehansolo) January 13, 2016
In fact, it sounds like Ben needs to be put in his place. The old Han Solo would have gruffly given him some tough love, and that would’ve done the trick. Whatever you’re doing here, instead? It’s not going to turn out well.
