Taylor Swift’s (Alleged) MySpace Comments And Photos Are Mid-2000s Gold

In the mid-2000s, before I knew any better, I was an active member on a popular Dave Matthews Band message board. I’m not going to share my username, because no one needs to read my “Grey Street” breakdown or that time I asked other fans if they could send me every “Halloween” bootleg they had. Thankfully, the comments have been lost to time — in that, they’re still online, but no one cares; I’m not one of the biggest pop stars in the world.

Taylor Swift isn’t so lucky.

BuzzFeed recently unearthed her MySpace comments and photos from 2005 to 2006, when she was a burgeoning Nashville star who was about to release her first album. It’s a very different persona than the one she presents today — there are references to sex vans, she compliments her friend’s boobs, and one post ends with “haha f*ck sewing machines.” She is everyone, circa 2005.

Here are some highlights (these are only alleged to have been written by Taylor, but fans of hers from back in the day claim they’re real).

Everybody watch Kelsey’s scrolling pictures of her friends until you get to the one of shelby.

Her boobs look AMAZING.

hahahahahahaha

I am obsessed with you.

If you look out your window and down the street about 200 yards, you may see a big white van parked on the street. I am inside the van with a telescope and computer. Just trying to catch a glimpse of kelsey dammmm morris.

haha. end of story

Guess who has a thing for you.

The hottest guy in the world.

Whats the mixture of a tiger and a lion?

A WHORE.

think about it.

THAT PICTURE OF ME UP AT THE TOP IS GROSS

THAT IS SICK TAKE IT DOWN

It serves NO purpose other than to make me look FUGYLY.

I want it off NOW.

but I loove you

I read your complaining comment about how your not on abilgails top 8. well, how could you be? I’M THERE. TAKING YOUR SPOT HAHAHAHA (evil laugh, you know the drill). Well, anyway, listen my queer fellow, I thinketh we shall hangeth out sometime soon, eh? yes yes, i do believe i am growing fond of this idea. drive over in your sex van and come pick me up. farewell knave

uhhh…

“I shot some guy with a flare gun”
-sahara

best line ever

Yes, that’s a line from the Matthew McConaughey vehicle Sahara. Who among us wasn’t quoting Sahara on MySpace as a teenager?

A Dashboard Confessional song was playing when this photo was taken.

(Via BuzzFeed)

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