This Hoser Robbing A Store In Full Hockey Gear To Score Beer Is The Most Canadian Heist Ever

As far as Canadian stereotypes go, buddy in Russell, Manitoba was f*ckin’ given’r to break new ground, eh? Or in English, there was one gentleman in the Canadian prairies that managed achievement in the world of embodying stereotypes.

Mounties are on the lookout for two bandits that smashed into a local store to nab beer and presumably go home to snort rails of Kraft Dinner. As the video above shows, one of the robbers was decked out in beer league goalie gear. Heck, the thief even brought his stick to top off the ensemble. (Legal Note: We can’t rule out the culprit being Ed Belfour.) Full points to the RCMP for the sassy YouTube video title “#17 in your program but #1 on the Russell Manitoba RCMP wanted list.” We’d like to take a stance that a goalie using the number 17 is a crime against hockey nature and this beer thief should be sent to prison strictly for that. Thankfully, the Royal Canadian Mounted Police also have found that number choice to be peculiar.

“He may have been a defenceman or forward in disguise as he was wearing jersey #17 — a non-traditional number for goalies,” noted the cops in their press release on the none-more-hoser incident. It really is a savvy disguise even with the number hiccup, as rural folks in Manitoba will get loaded on Labatt Wildcat or “Rockaberry” Canada Cooler and play road hockey at any ol’ time of day. It’s a quality cover.

Former NHL vet and current TSN analyst Martin Biron was helpful enough to provide his expertise online regarding the ridiculous clip.

Of course, do not approach a goalie if you see them in public. They’re known to be a dangerous bunch from time-to-time.

(Via BarDown)