As Uproxx Sports’ esteemed football illustrator and prognosticator Dave Rappoccio will do every week during the NFL season, he attempted to predict the outcome of the Week 1 games. For those he got wrong, his punishment to himself was to draw a cartoon based off the game’s outcome. In Week 1, Dave went 10-6. Here are the illustrations for those six incorrect picks:
“If Tyrod beats Andrew Luck, I will draw Rex Ryan telling Luck that he’s switching to Progressive.”
“If the Chiefs win, I will draw Alex Smith as the Grinch standing on J.J. Watt with a narrator saying, ‘And his hands grew three sizes that day.’ “
“If the Rams win, I will draw Nick Foles peeing into Russell Wilson’s recovery water as Russell drinks it and talks about Jesus.”
“If the Titans win, I will draw Marcus Mariota stealing Jameis’ crab legs.”
“If the Falcons win, I will draw Tim Tebow hitting Chip Kelly with a battery.”
“If the Chargers win, I will draw Philip Rivers making a dumb face as his bolo tie shoots a laser through Stafford.”
Tune in next week to find out which teams will be mocked by illustration.