Today is October 23. In the Lochte household, this means that today is the day when the birth of Carter is celebrate. Carter is the dog of Olympic swimmer and well-documented truth stretcher Ryan Lochte. Like all dogs, Carter is a good dog. Proof:
https://twitter.com/RyanLochte/status/713102446256648192
Good dog.
We learned that it is Carter’s birthday because Ryan posted this picture onto his Twitter:
https://twitter.com/RyanLochte/status/790300062345629700
Again, Carter seems like a good dog. He deserves to have one heck of a birthday where his belly is rubbed and he gets to eat steak for dinner and his owner is aware of how old he is.
That last thing could end up being an issue. You see, before Lochte sent out that tweet, he sent out a tweet saying that Carter was eight. This could be a mistake, sure, but as one Twitter user pointed out, Lochte apparently believes that his dog has been eight years old for three years.
https://twitter.com/wholegrainne/status/790296957520445440
So, let’s break this down tweet by tweet. In his first tweet from 2014, he just says that his dog is 8. OK, that’s fine, but the confusion comes with his 2015 tweet, when he says that his dog was born in 2007, which would make Carter… 8. And then there was Sunday’s original tweet, where he said that Carter was turning 8, which shows a stunning lack of understanding towards calendars.
You may be saying “his finger obviously just slipped and he hit ‘8’ each year,” which may be true. But dude made the exact same mistake each year for three years in a row, and with how much people love their pets, there’s no way that he would keep up a tweet saying that Carter is eight unless he actually thought that Carter was eight.
If you disagree with this, I implore you to remember that Lochte thought that “Jewish Thanksgiving” was a thing that existed up until recently. And he created an international incident because he didn’t want to tell the truth about a wild night in Rio to his mom. That too.
