My feelings for Tyler Hansbrough can best be summed up by this classic Kids in the Hall sketch. For all I know, Hansbrough could be the nicest, sweetest guy in the world and the greatest teammate that any guy could ever play basketball with. But his face – I see it and I just start punching my monitor and OH GOD WHY DO I WANT TO PUNCH HIS FACE SO MUCH???
But I digress. Say what you want about Hansbrough, but his ability to get under his opponents’ skin is unparalleled, like a 2013 version of Dennis Rodman without all of the tattoos, piercings and venereal diseases. And Hansbrough’s best efforts were on display Saturday night, as the Indiana Pacers pummeled the Detroit Pistons for the second night in a row, but not before Will Bynum took a cheap shot at Hansbrough’s gut.
It’s not his face, but it’s a good start.
Look, I don’t want to be that guy who devolves into a YouTube commenter mentality – oh, and feel free to read the race war comments on that video if you want your brain to melt – so I want to make it clear that I’m not encouraging player violence against Hansbrough. But I really think that getting punched could become Hansbrough’s new thing.
Bynum was ejected from Saturday’s game and has received a one-game suspension from the league for his punch, which is no big deal because the Pistons are terrible and they don’t pose a threat to the Pacers’ playoff hopes. What about the March 3 game against the Chicago Bulls, though? And the March 6 game against the Boston Celtics? And especially the March 10 game against the Miami Heat, the only team better than the Pacers in the East.
I think Hansbrough owes it to his teammates to bust his ass in those games to make guys like Joakim Noah, Kevin Garnett and LeBron James punch him as hard as they possibly can so they’ll receive suspensions. Don’t let us down, Tyler.
