(Spoilers for House of the Dragon, both TV show and book, will be found below.)
In House of the Dragon’s third episode, sin begets sin and old transgressions never stay buried for long.
The show’s been teasing war for a few weeks now but finally, there’s movement on that front as Daemon makes his way to Harrenhal and quickly encounters the ghosts of failed assasination attempts past. While he struggles to define what’s real and what might be the work of the castle’s resident witch, Rhaenyra wrangles an unruly council and Aegon sends Criston Cole on the road. The episode ends with some truly unserious hijinks that prove prophecies have no place in this game for the throne.
Here’s a breakdown of the biggest moments from episode three and what they mean for the show going forward.
The Blackwoods Vs. The Brackens
The show’s third episode opens with a glimpse of the chaos a war between Targaryens might cause across the realm. We meet (maybe?) Benjicot Blackwood, Westeros’ number one shit stirrer, as he confront members of House Bracken over a heap of moved stones and grazing cows. Settling the question of boundary lines isn’t really his priority though, it’s drawing blood, something he’s quick to do when a knight for Team Green throws around the term “babe killer” in relation to his queen. It’s a jarring reset when the screen fades from two boys with barely-dropped balls arguing over cattle to a field littered with dead bodies and slain soldiers, but it’s an effective one, reminding us how easily the fight among dragons can be used as fodder to fuel centuries-long feuds.
The good news? The real Benjicot will have survived this bout and become a Lord. RIP to his dad, though.
Preparing For War
Criston Cole’s got those first-day work jitters and for good reason. He’s replaced Otto Hightower as Aegon’s right hand man and now, he’s tasked with appeasing a bloodthirsty child who’s simply playing at being king. His grand scheme to pit brother against brother in the hopes Rhaenyra might get caught in the crosshairs failed embarrassingly, so he’s tasked with a new battle plan. Out of his depth amongst a council that’s filled with vultures who’ve spent years scheming their way to a seat of power, Cole plays the only hand he has: his ability to pick up a sword and whack the sh*t out of people. The idea of violence – and a march on Harrenhal to secure the Riverlands – satisfies Aegon’s craving for revenge, which should be enough to mark it as a truly terrible decision. We honestly can’t wait to see it blow up in his punch-able little face.
While we wait, Rhaenyra is at Dragonstone sans her husband, burying a member of her Kingsguard and his traitorous brother together because she is a kind and just ruler like that. (For some people, it just comes natural.) As much as House of the Dragon teased the idea of female rage and Rhaenyra’s desire for vengeance this season, the show has placed her as the voice of reason amongst the bunch of squabbling men surrounding her throne. It helps that she has Rhaenys, a woman who’s already suffered a humiliating rejection in the line of succession, to whisper words of wisdom in her ear. She suggests a treaty with Alicent, believing the two women desire peace more than the men currently behaving so impulsively at the Red Keep. Lucky for Rhaenyra, Mysaria has stuck around, hoping for a spot in her court in exchange for making the Hightowers pay for their crimes. Alicent may be playing babysitter to a table full of men jockeying for position with their idiotic war games, but it’s Rhaenyra, Mysaria, and Rhaenys who are actually plotting – ensuring that, should war come, dragons won’t die out and entire houses won’t be left without heirs. The tiny princes of Dragonstone are sent with a reluctant Rhaena to Pentos (along with some dragon eggs that should be familiar to Game of Thrones fans) and the question of a Driftmark heir is posed so blatantly, you’d have to be blind to miss how the Hull brothers factor in.
Team Green might be out for blood, but it’s Team Black that feels better positioned early on in this war. At least, for now.
Boys Night Out
Aegon, desperate to prove he actually knows how to ride a dragon, is swayed from donning some Valyrian steel and taking a road trip with Criston Cole by his new Master of Whispers, Larys Strong. Sure, what’s a boner over your mom’s feet pics to a sniveling tyrant in need of a court ally with some actual brains? Aegon drinks away his disappointment over not getting to show off his shiny new fit with a night on the town, buying drinks for the smallfolk and helping to pop his squire’s cherry – not personally of course, but if there’s one thing Aegon is, it’s a brothel expert. While there, he stumbles upon his brother doing that weird thing he likes to do, i.e. pretending to be a baby while the madame cradles his oversized naked body and sings him a lullaby or some sh*t. It’s all still too weird to investigate further, but Aegon’s not afraid to make a spectacle of his brother’s kink, revealing the prostitute is the same who took his virginity and possibly the only woman he’s ever been with. (Why does he even know that?) The layers of dysfunction continue to pile up between these two, but it’s fairly stupid on Aegon’s part to anger his best weapon – a man with the realm’s biggest dragon and loosest moral code. The odds that Aemond won’t betray him before the end are getting slimmer and slimmer.
The Witch Of Harrenhal
Daemon’s self-imposed exile brings him to Harrenhal, a crumbling castle – the largest in Westeros – that’s seen better days. The roof is leaking, the bones of Rhaenyra’s last lover still litter the floor, and the halls are literally haunted by those burned to death, courtesy of Daemon’s Targaryen ancestors. Claiming the dump is pretty anticlimactic considering it’s a gaudy trash heap run by an aging lord (Simon Strong) who hates his nephew – and having his venison supper interrupted. While Daemon worries over his potentially poisoned peas, Strong offers some helpful background on the situation in the Riverlands – a place showrunner Ryan Condal hinted we’d be spending plenty of time this season. It’s a grimy old swamp, sure, and it’s run by wrinkled husks with chronic diarrhea, but if Daemon can persuade these walking dustbins to bend the knee, he’ll control the largest undeclared host in the realm – and Harrenhal will be the garrison where it’s housed.
Hopefully that thought keeps the prickly little prince warm at night because nothing about Harrenhal is comforting. I once stayed at a motel with a bathroom so small, the door could only be opened one way lest it get stuck between the rusty toilet and the stained wall. I’d prefer that to this place, with its howling winds and burnt ceilings and whatever biohazard is responsible for the hallucinations Daemon begins to suffer from. His waking nightmare gives us the season’s first surprise cameo – Milly Alcock is back to play the younger Rhaenyra, left sewing up that poor kid’s throat as she scolds Matt Smith for the messes his character seems to constantly make. When Daemon comes to, he’s in front of a weirwood with a strange woman predicting he’ll die in this place. Is this Alys Rivers, the mystical blueprint for Melisandre who eventually aligns herself with Aemond to take down the Rogue Prince? Probably, but something about her face has me convinced she’s filmed a Tik Tok video before so I really can’t take her too seriously at this point. Birth a shadow baby and then we’ll talk, Al.
The Hand Marches On
If his personality didn’t do the trick, Criston Cole’s new haircut is enough to make the nethers of every woman in Westeros drier than the Red Waste. Before he can take off for the Riverlands with a shockingly small contingent, Alicent bursts his bubble by inviting her brother, Gwayne Hightower (Freddie Fox) to crash his boys’ trip. The guy’s not too pleased about his dad’s dismissal from court, or that he’s going to be expected to sleep outdoors, making him a real thorn in Cole’s side. Their argument on the King’s Road makes them easy prey for Baela, who’s doing a bit of patrolling in the skies, but before she can toast him, Cole manages to find cover. If cockroaches exist in Westeros, Cole needs to be classified as one.
A Prophecy Retold
We’ll probably never make it through a season of George R.R. Martin’s universe without hearing that damn Prince Who Was Promised prophecy but House of the Dragon manages to give it more purpose in the waning minutes of episode three. It’s been a red herring and a let-down for Game of Thrones fans but here, it’s simply a story a paranoid and dying man clung to that, when misheard, caused the downfall of a great house and signaled the end of dragons. It’s ridiculous and insignificant and so stupid, it reminds us that yes, these characters are kings and queens and dragon-riders but they’re also just human. Rhaenyra pulls a Sister Act move, disguising herself as a nun in order to intercept Alicent in the hope she can convince her to have a talk with her son, but their chat doesn’t go as planned. Instead, she learns Alicent heard her father’s prophecy and, not understanding its true meaning, believed he’d changed his mind about the line of succession. It’s a flimsy excuse considering Alicent knows what a waste of space Aegon is and lived all her life knowing her husband not only loved his daughter, but believed in her ability to rule. Still, the way Emma D’Arcy sells this breakdown of a friendship, the yearning in Rhaenyra’s eyes, the tremble in her voice as she pleads with her former ally to let go of her pride and admit her mistake before thousands die, it’s pretty damn powerful.