The Breaking Bad online auction came to a close yesterday, and when all the dust had settled and all the amphetamines had crystallized, fans of the show had forked over somewhere in the neighborhood of $1 million for props and costumes from the show. Top bids included $65,500 for Walter White’s copy of Leaves of Grass; $26,750 for Tio Salamanca’s wheelchair bell; $75 million for three additional episodes over $20,000 each for two versions of the pink teddy bear; and $20,250 for Tuco’s gold grill. But the real story here, as it usually is, is underpants.
Walt (Bryan Cranston) was seen an inordinate number of times in his underwear — and one lucky fan was willing to pay $9,900 for the pair he wore in the pilot. The briefs are on display at the Museum of the Moving Image until Oct. 18. [THR]
Far be it from me to tell anyone how to spend their money, but someone shelling out almost $10,000 for a pair of used tighty-whities raises at least one pretty important question: What in the hell do you do with them? Like, do you frame them and hang them over the fireplace? Do you keep them under glass like the Declaration of Independence and wait for someone to bring it up — I imagine framed underpants are quite the conversation starter — so you can explain that you loved Breaking Bad so much that you considered a near-five-figure pair of Fruit of the Looms to be a reasonable investment? Do you … no … you wouldn’t …
… no one would …
… it would be crazy …
… right? ….
… I mean, you can’t just …
… like …
…
…
Do you wear them? Is that what you do? Do you put them on one morning and just go about your day with the secret knowledge that you, a very normal person, are wearing the same underpants that Walter White wore when he first cooked meth on Breaking Bad? Do you walk up to strangers and shout “GUESS WHOSE UNDERWEAR I’M WEARING” until you get arrested? What if there are kids around? I’m assuming you can afford bail since you just spent $9,900 on underwear, but, like, YEESH, you know?
This is all very unsettling.
