Stephen Colbert tries to ignore Tucker Carlson as much as possible (we should all be so lucky), but The Late Show host couldn’t resist discussing the dishonest propagandist‘s new obsession: roasting your nuts. In his Fox Nation documentary series, Tucker Carlson Originals, Carlson praises the supposed benefits of “testicle tanning” with his “fitness professional” guest Andrew McGovern. “So, obviously, half the viewers are now like, ‘What? Testicle tanning — that’s crazy.’ But my view is, OK, testosterone levels have crashed and nobody says anything about it. That’s crazy,” Carlson explained.
Speaking of crazy, Colbert called Carlson “one of the engineers on the express train to right-wing crazy town” for among other things, his documentary on the “de-broing” of America. “I gotta say, coming from a Fox News anchor, that is a refreshing and positive celebration of homoeroticism,” the comedian joked following a montage of sweaty, shirtless hunks. “Good for you, fellas!” And now we’ve arrived at the testicle tanning.
“I’m no urologist, but if the Lord intended testicle health to include a lot of sunlight, I think he would have put them where the sun do shine,” Colbert said. “Like on your shoulders, or something. But there it is, Tucker is promoting testicle tanning, which is surprising, because the last time I checked, he is the whitest d*ck ever.”
You can watch Colbert’s monologue above.