Tim Heidecker Offers The Aggressively Honest Public Apology We Won’t Get From James Corden

In this cold, cold world, we can all take heart in our shared love of people banning James Corden from their restaurants. That’s what happened earlier this week when Balthazar owner Keith McNally publicly excoriated Corden as a “tiny Cretin of a man” who abused his waitstaff. Corden then apologized privately, and all was forgiven, but since we’re not getting a public version of that apology, Tim Heidecker has stepped up to impersonate one for us.

The weird thing is that I can’t tell if that’s an excellent Corden impression or simply a generic London accent. Or both? The not-weird thing is that Heidecker’s public apology as Corden is less a parodic stab at Corden and more a send-up of the need for public apologies in the first place. Every time a celebrity ends up in the bad graces of The Internet, we’re treated to something like this that might as well end with an entreaty to continue consuming their work. That’s the point, right? “I’m sorry-ish, but please don’t stop buying my merch.”

Plus, Corden was right.

Gasp! But yes. Why was this a public thing to begin with? What was gained by McNally making it publicly known that Corden was banned? All the Late Late Show host did was take something private that should have been there to begin with.