Empire (FOX, 8:00-10:00 p.m.) — Pour yourself a cocktail made out of the tears of FOX executives who are being forced to say goodbye to their ratings juggernaut, because Empire‘s two-hour season finale is here and Snoop Dog, Jennifer Hudson, Rita Ora, and Patti LaBelle are coming along for the ride.
Is LaBelle going to once again play Chelsea Paige from the 90s NBC sitcom/occasional music showcase Out All Night that was clearly a precursor to Empire? No, that would be ridiculous (and amazing), but Lucious and Jamal are going to make headway in their relationship, Hakeem is going to play with fire, and Cookie is going to cook something up. Because that’s what Cookie does when her time isn’t consumed by the pursuit of fabulosity.
Arrow (CW, 8:00 p.m.) — Oliver comes back to Starling City after meeting with Ra’s al Ghul and encounters Murmur, a new baddie that is wreaking havoc on the city. Meanwhile, Malcom is still busted up, Laurel and Nyssa are becoming fast friends, and Ray gets in on some of the action.
Supernatural (CW, 9:00 p.m.) — New timeslot, same old Sam and Dean (shakes head and kicks dirt). This time out, Dean and Sam meet up with Cole and stumble onto a worm that is turning dudes into killing dudes — which is the worst kind of dude, bro. Also, the guy who directed Short Circuit directed this episode, so show some f*cking respect.
20/20: The Untold Story Of The Sound Of Music (ABC, 10:00 p.m.) — Join Diane Sawyer as she takes you back to Salzburg for an inside look at everything that went into creating The Sound of Music. From cocaine piles that were made into the shape of The Alps, to Julie Andrews and Christopher Plummer bonding over the disposal of that villager that he strangled one night in an alley beside the square, your heart will come alive with sound of stories that will von Trapp a smile on your face! And oh, if only that were all true…
Workaholics (Comedy Central, 10:00 p.m.) — Adam and Blake throw a trivia party!
The Americans (FX, 10:00 p.m.) — Martha’s and Clark’s marriage is put to the test and Elizabeth needs to ask Gabriel for assistance on the show that I am clearly not watching.
It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (FXX, 10:00 p.m.) — Mac and Charlie join a cult.
TV Land Has Original Programming Too, You Guys (TV Land, 10:00-11:00 p.m.) — Hot in Cleveland begins the back half of its last season because no just God would allow it to last as long as Golden Girls did, and won’t you let Cedric entertain you with a live season premiere episode for The Soul Man?
Broad City (Comedy Central, 10:30 p.m.) — In the season finale, Abbi and Ilana celebrate Ilana’s 23rd birthday in New York with expensive wine and a 10-foot foliage man. There’s also an awesome response to “You should smile” catcallers and assorted other bits of amazingness. Come back soon, Broad City.
Man Seeking Woman (FXX, 10:30 p.m.) — Josh tries, once more, to get Maggie back. Will it work? I DO NOT POSSESS PSYCHIC SKILLZ, STOP ASKING ME!
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Tony Romo and Hannibal Buress on Kimmel; Norm Macdonald on Letterman (or so the Germans would have us believe!); Will Ferrell and Chelsea Peretti on Fallon; Lena Dunham and Erin Andrews on Meyers; Kevin Hart on The Daily Show; and Sean Penn, Sasha Alexander, and Dana Gould on Conan.
