With 64 games left in his Major League Baseball career – give or take another playoff run – New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter really needs to start thinking about the future. It’s probably safe to assume that the Captain is well-off financially, having wisely invested the small fortune that he’s earned over the span of his 20 years in Major League Baseball. Or maybe he has quietly blown it all and he’ll wind up as one of those guys doing anything he can to make extra money, from signing memorabilia that makes fun of Alex Rodriguez to boxing other retired athletes and celebrities on primetime Fox specials.
Either way, one thing he’ll never be short of is ladies that would love to take home one of his gift bags, as Jeter has been known to be quite the ladies’ man, in case you’ve been living under the Brooklyn Bridge (and even then, you’re probably aware). Still, the ladies at the Show Palace strip club in Queens are offering Jeter a special retirement package to honor his two decades, 14 All-Star Games, 5 World Series wins, and 3,412 hits and counting, among other accolades.
An all-nude joint in New York City is offering Derek Jeter and the rest of the Yankees organization free lap dances Sept. 7, the same day that the team is officially honoring the captain.
All Yankee employees will receive free admission and two free lap dances, the Show Palace in Queens announced. Plus, the dancers will be painted in pinstripes.
If Jeter himself were to show up, a rep tells The Huffington Post, he “gets unlimited lap dances and food and a lifetime free-entry pass to Show Palace as a thank you for his years of service as a New York Yankee.” (Via the HuffPo)
Now, I’m willing to bet that Jeter won’t be making any appearances at Show Palace anytime soon, no matter how generous this offer may be. But I’d be willing to toss a shiny nickel on a prop bet that A-Rod shows up claiming to be Jeter and spends a few evenings asking the women if they’re into centaur erotica before they finally ban him for life. Nobody wants you anywhere, A-Rod. Just accept it already.