‘Orange Is The New Black’ Discussion: The Curse Of The ‘After’ Kiss

Note: Orange is the New Black discussion posts are intended to give a full season perspective, and may contain minor spoilers.

Previously: Orange is the New Black: Season Two, Episode Seven

Orange is the New Black’s eighth episode of season two, “Appropriately Sized Pots,” toyed with themes of death — between Jimmy’s likely imminent demise following her “compassionate” release, Piper’s grandmother dying, Miss Rosa getting turned down for a surgery that could save her life, along with the the flashbacks of Rosa’s deceased partners previously mentioned in episode four and her concern for her young friend. Maybe it was because they didn’t kiss, but both Rosa’s teenage friend and third lover/partner in crime at least both managed to make it out of the episode alive. I don’t know about you guys, but I was really happy to see that little sh*tpot go into remission.

Wasn’t I just saying a few episodes back that Piper finally seemed to be redeeming herself? Yeah well scratch that, because clueless martyr Piper is back, stinking up the place (although not as bad as Soso) with her completely oblivious humblebragging about her upcoming furlough. Was there no part of her that thought, oh hey, I’m getting completely preferential treatment to every other single person in here, maybe keep this sh*t to myself? Well sucks for her, because her grandmother died first anyway. Okay that actually was kind of sad though.

Random thoughts:

  • Was I the only one who thought that it was a tad convenient that Rosa’s third partner in crime/lover was able to come visit her in jail like that? I mean, wouldn’t they be like, looking for her accomplices too? Sure she did the last job on her own, but I would think even in the ’80s cops could put two and two together.
  • I actually wouldn’t be upset if this entire series just turned into a buddy comedy between an old lady bank robber with cancer and her teenage protege. Kind of like Breaking Bad only in reverse?
  • Rosa’s going through romantic partners faster than Sookie totally reminded me of the crime version of this Kids in the Hall clip.
  • I’ve been back and forth about Caputo all season so far but when he went so far as to actually fire Fischer, there’s no coming back from that. Obviously he’s just trying to save his own ass by carrying out Fig’s orders, but no doubt that was personal. F*ck that guy.
  • As much as I can’t stand Soso, that shower scene was uncomfortable to watch.
  • This, on the other hand, was hilarious. Although I can speak from personal experience that turtle tanks don’t smell bad if they’re properly filtered and maintained.

  

  • Even though Piper was kind of awful this episode, on the plus side there was no Larry!
  • What is Vee’s oily obsession with Red’s business, anyway? They’re both selling completely different contraband. Can’t they operate and co-exist peacefully? Ugh, Vee.
  • So we lost a Fischer and gained a Pornstache. That sounds like a pretty even trade except for the complete opposite of that.
  • Finally, Jesus saw that.