Comments of the Week: Lewis Black Edition

06.21.10 8 years ago 83 Comments

We have Comedy Central to thank for this week’s prize, Stark Raving Black, now

It was hard to choose a winner and I went back and forth a few times, but I figure you can’t beat the quiet simplicity of ZeroCharisma in the Michael Jai White Teaches How to Throw an Unblockable Punch thread.

ZeroCharisma says:
 (*office is now littered with unconscious managers*)

Well done, Zero, be sure to send me your address. Runners up after the jump. For next week, keep up the good commenting to win the Predator: Ultimate Hunter Edition. As always, nominate for next week by copy and pasting in the comment section below.

From last week’s Box Office Round Up:

Stinky Peet: Rampage Jackson wants to know, “Why we in a film that tanked?!”

From WB Plans Hollywood Slick Version of Don Quixote:

Chareth Cutestory says: “Yo, girl, I got a windmill you can tilt at.”
(*helicopters d-ck*)

From Thomas Kinkade Becomes the Painter of Bud Light:

ChinoMoreno says: I wish he would have crashed into one of Bob Ross’ happy little trees.

From Nic Cage Wants Chocolate Cake:

Donkey Hodey says: My chocolate cake brings Nic Cage to the yard and he’s like “this acting is hard” damn right, hamming it up like a tard.

From Knight and Day’s Orwellian Ads Fail to Convince Public:

 says: Tom Cruise has a painting that ages instead of him.

That painting is called Cameron Diaz.

Monsoon says: 
So wait, this isn’t a reboot of Inch High Private Eye? Damn. Now I’m not interested either.

From Fraggle Rock Script Deemed “Not Edgy Enough”:

Morton Salt: I was in a writing course where we asked to write a piece that was “provocactive -EDGY!”. I wrote an haiku where the middle line was:

Lap up the c*nt blood, Jesus

I’m sure you can guess the first and third lines. Anyhow, I got a B-.

fubar says: Christopher Walken: I hid this uncomfortable hunk of fraggle up my ass for 2 years. Now it’s yours, son.

From Unstoppable Punch:

Relapser says:
Michael Jai: What up dawg, you wanna learn the unstoppable punch?
Kimbo Slice: Bitch, I already know how to make Kool-aid.

From The Breakfast Club has a porn parody:

Deux Deux Deux says: Emilio Estevez’s porn name is Charlie Sheen.

Drunk on.

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