TL;DR has become a way of life, everything is susceptible to abbreviation, and 2015’s Oxford word of the year was the “face with tears of joy” emoji (not a word). It’s fair to say the English language is unwell. The cure? Who knows, but deleting the following 16 words and terms from our vocabularies — as admittedly hard as that might be in some cases — might be a good start. And at the very least, it’ll give slanguage innovators a fresh canvas to come up with new terms for us to all overuse in the new year.
“Bae”
What It Means: “Before All Else;” A cutesy name for your significant other.
The fact that it means “poop” in Danish should be enough to put you off it for good.
“AF”
What It Means: “as f*ck”
When did “really” become an insufficient adjective? Maybe you’re trying to sound like a badass, but if you’re using it in the context of “this blanket is cozy af,” you’ve already lost that battle.
“Woke”
What It Means: being aware of what’s going on in the world around you.
While this is definitely a quality to have, “staying woke” is just a grammatical nightmare.
“Basic”
What It Means: when you like obvious, generic stuff like Starbucks, Friends, and Ugg boots.
Listen, frappuccinos are delicious and Uggs are cozy. Is that a Rachel thing to say?
“Literally Me”
What It Means: usually used when you connect with something on a deep level.
Listen. I get it. We’ve all decided that literally can mean whatever the hell we want it to mean. But that Vine of the baby sloth happily eating fruit isn’t “literally you.” The line has to be drawn somewhere.
“Life Hack”
What It Means: a technique that is supposed to make your life easier.
We could just return to “recipe” or “tips.” That would make life easier, albeit less cool sounding. #LifeHacked
“Squad”
What It Means: when “that group of people you hang with on the reg” is just an inefficient amount of words.
While the idea of weaponized female friendship is an intriguing one, this basically only applies if you’re tall, rich, and surround yourself with models. Thanks a lot, Taylor Swift.
“Goals”
What It Means: something you aspire to obtain or achieve in your lifetime, usually part of a hashtag.
While goals in the traditional sense are great, if you’re saying things like “omg Justin and Jessica are totes #relationshipgoals”, you might want to take a step back.
“Totes”
What It Means: a sweet abbrieve for “totally.”
Just say “totally.” You’re an adult.
“On Fleek”
What It Means: When you look hot and your eyebrows are in especially good condition.
When your Cool Aunt tries out a new term on Facebook, it’s time to abandon ship. “On fleek” will be the first to fall in the new year. Book it.
“Cray”
What It Means: short for “crazy”
Only Kanye and Hova are allowed to say “that sh*t cray.”
“Bye, Felicia”
What It Means: A line from the 1995 comedy Friday that became inexplicably popular in 2015 thanks to Cookie on Empire.
You’re 20 years too late on this one and there are honest-to-goodness Felicia’s who are being harmed by the herp-like spread of this term. #DontCryFelicia
“-gate”
What It Means: Refers to any sort of scandal that takes over online discussion, i.e. Deflategate, Gamergate, Dressgate, etc.
Unless you are referring to some incriminating Nixon information, just stop.
“Yolo”
What It Means: “You Only Live Once”
Luckily, this one seems to be falling out of vogue. Can we please make 2016 the year we abandon Yolo forever?
“Thirsty”
What It Means: Too eager for attention, usually from the opposite sex.
Sure, we all walked out of The Force Awakens desperately wishing that Oscar Isaac was our boyfriend, but there’s gotta be a better way to say it. Let’s leave “thirsty” to the Kardashians, where it belongs.
“Feels”
What It Means: overwhelming emotions
Honestly, using “feels” infantilizes and delegitimizes your feelings. Feelings aren’t bad! Own up to them!
