It’s one of the oldest gags in gaming: Tetris! The Movie! It’s so old, Penny Arcade used it as a joke more than a decade ago. It’s so old a parody trailer made the rounds six years ago. But apparently somebody is actually trying to make it happen.
And it’s not some insane guy, either. Well, not as such. It’s Lawrence Kasanoff, who has a long career in Hollywood and does not appear to be noted for his practical jokes. We should take a moment to point out that Kasanoff was also the guy who spent a decade making a computer animated movie starring food brands. No, seriously. That’s a thing that exists:
He told the Wall Street Journal this, apparently with no signs of intoxication or other drug use:
“It’s a very big, epic sci-fi movie…This isn’t a movie with a bunch of lines running around the page. We’re not giving feet to the geometric shapes. Brands are the new stars of Hollywood. We have a story behind ‘Tetris’ which makes it a much more imaginative thing…We certainly have the canvas for location-based entertainment based on the epicness.
We admit it: We’re curious. Not to see the movie, because nobody’s that masochistic. We just want to see the script that convinced him Tetris will be the next great trilogy, because either it’s genuinely amazing or that screenwriter is one hell of a salesman.