Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 2 has an amazing soundtrack of ’70s and ’80s greats, but at the very bottom, you might have noticed there’s a track from a band called “The Sneepers” and David Hasselhoff is on the track. If you were wondering what it is? It’s glorious, is what it is.
The whole thing is a vast, nerdy in-joke, of course. It’s pretty blatantly a riff on Meco’s disco take on the Star Wars theme, a huge hit in 1977. And if you listen closely, you can hear plenty of Tyler Bates’ score discofied into the song.
But the real appeal here is the star himself, the Hoff. Apparently David Hasselhoff is something of an ongoing theme in the movie, and as a result, the man who redefined foreign musical success with his hits in Germany appears here. For your delectation, we have placed the lyrics (from James Gunn himself) below:
Getting down and dirty with a procyon lotor/
Got no people skills but he’s good with motors.
That weird thing by his side an infantilized sequoia/
The two of them walk by, people say “Oh Boy-a”.
They ask me why I’m bringin’/
A baby into battle.
“Thats really irresponsible”/
And getting them rattled.
I say “Give me a break/
Get off my back dammit”.
I didn’t learn parenting/
My daddy was a planet.
In these times of hardship
We are Groot
Man, remember when every movie had a terrible song like this? Where’d we go wrong, as a country, that the Hoff doesn’t rap over every movie?