One week. I once had “The Chicken Dance” stuck in my head for one full week. I don’t even know how the godforsaken thing got in there. It’s not like I had just attended a wedding or some other function where uncles and aunts need to be coaxed onto the dance floor. I just woke up one morning and, boom, Chicken Dance, like coming down with the flu. And like the flu, it stayed with me for seven miserable, miserable days.
Hey, do you know what the worst part of having “The Chicken Dance” stuck in your head is? I’ll tell you: It makes you look like a crazy person. When most other songs get stuck in your head and you start humming them mindlessly in a crowded elevator, the worst people will think of you is that you have bad taste in music. But if you’re packed in shoulder-to-shoulder and start mumbling “ba-da-ba-da-bada-ba, ba-da-ba-da-bada-ba, ba-da-ba-da-bada-ba, ba ba ba ba,” people will understandably begin to think you’re nuts. “Is … is that grown man singing The Chicken Dance?” their wide, unblinking eyes will scream to each other as they all begin to realize what is happening. “Is he going to murder us?”
And guess what: they’re not wrong. By Day 7 of having “The Chicken Dance” stuck in your head, you might murder them. Whether the song brought on your insanity or your insanity brought on the song is irrelevant (a real Chicken Dance or the egg situation), because it is there now and it is
TEARING
YOUR
LIFE
APART.
I’m sure you have your own stories about having songs stuck in your head. Please, feel free to share them below. And if my tale of woe and madness has put “The Chicken Dance” in your head, well, I apologize. No one deserves that hell.
