Undefeated UFC middleweight champ, Chris “The All-American” Weidman is a fairly handsome, charming, dapper fellow. With two kids and a third on the way, he appears to have a pretty good marriage, so I assume when Karyn Bryant asked Chris to detail how his first date went with his wife during a visit to the UFC Tonight set, she was expecting an adorable story about two teenagers going to an Italian restaurant and maybe an awkward attempt at a goodnight kiss.
Instead, she got an actual sh*t show. As Weidman details, his future wife, Marivi, was in the bathroom, taking a shower. Chris had a sudden need to poop, but the only other option was upstairs, Marivi’s parents’ personal bathroom, which was out of the question. The need growing, Weidman asks Marivi to hurry up, but to no avail. Spying a small garbage can, Chris unleashes his bowels and takes the full bag outside to the big trash cans.
Unfortunately, it would appear some of his diarrhea spilled, and Marivi’s mom ends up yelling at her dad for farting and stinking up the entire house. Chris notices some poop on the floor, so in a moment of brilliant thinking, he throws one of his socks on it to cover it up and waits on the bed for Marivi to come out of the shower.
She instantly notices something is amiss, and asks Chris point blank “Did you sh*t in my garbage can?”
Despite him being a completely disgusting individual (He didn’t even wipe his butt after pooping in a trash can!), Marivi has stayed with Chris ever since, which, as he says “is true love”
I guess that just goes to show, even if the first date turns out horrible, there’s still a chance. You just have to be an amazing, world champion athlete.
