Josh Cribbs Is Taking Down Corruption

Senior Writer
06.22.11 4 Comments

Josh Cribbs is living through this lockout the best he can. He’s working out, training hard, and doing what he can to be completely screwed over by the new kickoff rules, but he’s done it all while keeping a low profile. Until now. What started out as a simple trip to get a haircut has turned into one of the biggest athlete scandals in the history of professional sports. Josh Cribbs… got a parking ticket.

But this isn’t just any ordinary $15 parking ticket. Cribbs says that this ticket is undeserved and is a clear, shining example of a corrupt Cleveland police department that he must now wage war against to save the people of Cleveland, lest they forever be subject to unfair parking fines.

“I was at the barber and I went outside to put a quarter in the meter. I saw I had a parking ticket. But there was eight minutes left on the meter, I was highly upset,” said Cribbs.

“I wrote, ‘not guilty!’ I made sure to take pictures with time stamps,” laughs Cribbs. “I got a lot of response. People saying the Cleveland Heights Police Department is notorious for writing out tickets, people who have been wronged.”

“Well, since this is a lockout, I have the time to fight for Cleveland, fight for the blue collar workers here, and I think it’s wrong and I am trying to stand up for those who can’t,” said Cribbs. (Fox 8 Cleveland)

As Cribbs points out, it costs $50 to fight a $15 parking ticket in Cleveland, so he’s taking it upon himself to save thousands of his neighbors $35 each. But this isn’t simply a case of a hero taking down the corrupt law. Not if the police have anything to say about it.

According to Chief Jeffrey Robertson with the Cleveland Heights Police Department, “We do not ticket without a violation. It appears that someone came out and put a quarter in Mr. Cribbs’ meter, or turned his meter back to allow for a grace period 22 minutes before he came out.”

Conspiracy! Intrigue! Scandal! Did the Cleveland police unfairly ticket Josh Cribbs? Did Cribbs somehow put a quarter in the meter and manipulate it or his photographic evidence to suggest that he had 8 minutes remaining? Will he help topple this bureaucratic empire of corruption before it completely consumes Cleveland $15 at a time? And most importantly, WILL THIS F*CKING LOCKOUT EVER END?

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